The 127 Hours star, 36, wrote the odd chunk of prose for Vice magazine as a contribution to their new fiction issue.
Although Franco’s tale, titled Bunglaow 89, is imaginary, it includes the names of real people and descriptions of actual events.
Somewhat awkwardly, the lead female character is called, you guessed it, Lindsay Lohan, and the accompanying image shows a bronzed Lohan sunbathing by a pool in a white bra.
“Once upon a time a guy, a Hollywood guy, read some Salinger to a young woman who hadn’t read him before. Let’s call this girl Lindsay,” he writes.
“She was a Hollywood girl but a damaged one (…), we were lying in bed. I wasn’t going to f*** her. She had her head on my shoulder. She started to talk. I let her.”
Franco goes on to talk about Lohan’s run-ins with the law, her “high hellion days” when she “couldn’t get work because she couldn’t get insured” and became what he calls “an out-of-control vehicle running on fumes”.
The US actor ends his bizarre piece with another hit at Lohan. “Every night Lindsay looked for me and I hid,” he concludes. “Out the window was Hollywood.”
Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
1/5 Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
Los Angeles, 15 Nov 2007: Lohan was jailed for just 84 minutes on 15 November for a drink driving offence. She turned herself in at Los Angeles County Women's Detention Center in Lynwood at 10:30 a.m. where she was searched, fingerprinted and placed in a holding cell in the inmate reception area but got to keep her street clothes, before being released at 11:54 a.m. Her original day-long sentence was reduced because she met criteria that took into account overcrowding at the lockup and the fact that her crime was nonviolent.
2/5 Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
Los Angeles, 24 Jul 2007: Lindsay Lohan in a booking photo taken by the Santa Monica police dept. She was arrested at 1:35AM driving a white GMC Yukon and failed a breath test. She was booked for driving under the influence, possession of a controlled substance and for driving with a suspended license.
3/5 Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
Mugshot of Lindsay Lohan back in prison after failing a mandatory drug test , Los Angeles, 24 Sep 2010.
4/5 Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
Lindsay Lohan mugshot, 19 Oct 2011: This picture was taken after a judge ruled that the actress had violated the terms of her probation. Her bail was set at $100,000 and the judge lectured Lohan for failing to complete the terms of her community service. Months earlier, Lohan was ordered to complete 360 hours at the Downtown Women's Center but was terminated from the shelter after blowing off nine community service appointments.
5/5 Lindsay Lohan's mugshots
Booking photo mugshot of Lindsay Lohan, Santa Monica Police Department, California, 19 Mar 2013.
A list of Lohan’s famous lovers leaked online last year, with Heath Ledger, Joaquin Phoenix and Franco among the published names. He admitted in an interview that they “made out” years ago but it was “lame” and “not even a thing”.
“If you really want to get into it and, this is meaningless in my life, when we made out it was such a long time ago,” he said. “I was a nice guy. I thought, ‘The kiss is enough, she’s so young’. I swear on my mother’s life that I did not have sex with her.”