Despite the demise of the gay clubbing institution that was Brixton's Love Muscle there are plenty of other great nights offering above average levels of high-energy house and testosterone. Trade is one of the best gigs by anyone's standards, so it attracts more than its fair share of straight punters.
This gig is not for the faint-hearted as it starts to warm up just around the time that most people are leaving clubs, searching for a taxi and heading off back to the ranch.
With its laser-filled dancefloor and enough caverns to house a tribe of cavemen, Turnmills is an excellent venue with great chill-out areas and all-night cafe next door.
Despite losing the skills of Tony De Vit, residents Malcom Duffy, Steve Thomas and Alan Thompson know how to work a dancefloor into a state of frenzy.
There's no dress code here but there will be quite a few jaw-dropping outfits on display. All in all, it's worth trading a few hours sleep for such a memorable night.
63b Clerkwell Road, London EC1 (0171-607 5700) tomorrow 4am-midday, pounds 15/10
THE BEST OF THE REST
DAIQUIRI DISCO @ k bar
A formula of cheesy disco classics fused with modern house anthems has punters queuing down the street. The night's popularity means that plenty of "regulars" will gain entry before Joe Public but at least you'll get the chance to see a few minor celebrities go past. The gig attracts stylish clubbers who are willing to join in the mayhem. The music is basically fast food - perfect for instant consumption but pretty forgettable - it's the social vibe that everyone loves.
84 Wardour Street London W1 (0171-439 4393) Fri 10pm-4am pounds 10/pounds 5
UNLEASHED @ academy
If the Saints have lost, then Southampton is not always too good an experience on a Saturday, but a trip to the Academy is well worth it. Maybe it's because the club shuts at 2am that everyone seems to party so hard. The beats are housey: funky, uplifting and not too experimental. The Academy is your basic neo-industrial venue a la MoS and Hacienda, but the low prices at the bar are alone worth a trip down from London - it's carrying them across a rammed dancefloor that's the problem.
Lower Bannister Street, Southampton (01703 334 280) tonight 9pm-2am, pounds 2-pounds 5