Tuesday 13 April 1999
A rustle of horse-thieves (Octavia Leigh); a shirtlessness of racehorses (Paul Turner); a protestation of fox-lovers (Sue Johnson); a concatenation of cat-lovers (Colin O'Hare); a posse of pussies (S.J.); a Caribbean of caribou (B.B.); a humph of sceptics (Luela Palmer); an mmmm of doctors, an aaaah of dentists (Eric Dunkley); a bah bah de doo of jazz singers (Alex).
A lather of TV soaps (Andrew Duncan); a moon of cheeses (Eric Bridgstock); an indifference of waiters (John O'Byrne); an obstruction of bureaucrats (A.D.); a hamper of Planning Officers, a folly of architects (Pe.T.); a junket of MEPs (J.A.); a trough of EU commissioners (John Terris); a grouse of curmudgeons (Brendan J. O'Byrne); a conglumeration of depressives (Colin Archer); a detachment of the autistic (S.T.); a dearth of absentees (M.H.).
A One-I-Made-Earlier of TV cooks, a wife's-away of adult videos (Pa.T.); a gwynne of oranges, a labyrinth of maize (Mike Gifford); a parthenon of columnists (B.J.O'B.); a perplexity of togas (B.B.); a slither of salesmen, a bumshow of builders (Tom Gaunt); a horde of misers (M.H.); a nerd of Trekkies (Martin Brown); a whipround of masochists (C.A.); a gobble of gourmands (J.V.); a snip of castrati (J.T.).
A plummet of sky-divers (Pe.T.); a plunge of deep-sea divers (P. Catton); a cast of plasterers, a shop of informers (Alan Brooker); a culture of bacteriologists (Mary Brooker); a quiescence of yes-men (Matthew White); a corps of applegrowers, a breadth of visionaries (George H. Hudd).
A portmanteau of harbourmasters, a contentment of campers (C.O'H.); an irritation of e-mails (Michael Bryant-Mole); an annoyance of bunched-up buses (A.D.); an aggravation of cold callers, a vexation of double-glazing reps (Shirley Edmundson); a drive-you-potty of political candidates, a Go Yahweh! of Jehovah's Witnesses (Ella O'Key).
Jennifer Moore-Blunt, Luela Palmer and George Hudd each win a copy of the Chambers Dictionary of Quotations. John Lamper wonders: with chess now to be classified as a sport, what misdemeanours might lead to a red card in various mind games? Ideas to Loki. e-mail: Valhalla@btinternet.com. Or write to Creativity, Features, The Independent, 1 Canada Square, London E14 5DL, closing date 22 April.
Results and three more Chambers prizes will be announced on 27 April. Next week's tester: appropriate forms of transport.
After giving gay film R-rating despite no sex or violencefilm
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 'Alien thigh bone' on Mars: Excitement from alien hunters at 'evidence' of extraterrestrial life
- 2 Jeremy Clarkson 'sees no problem' with his racist language on Top Gear, says BBC
- 3 Richard Dawkins on babies with Down Syndrome: 'Abort it and try again – it would be immoral to bring it into the world'
- 4 London restaurant 34 creates champagne glass modelled on Kate Moss’ left breast
- 5 ALS ice bucket challenge co-founder Corey Griffin drowns, aged 27
Jeremy Clarkson 'sees no problem' with his racist language on Top Gear, says BBC
Lucy, film review: Scarlett Johansson will blow your mind in Luc Besson's complex thriller
Miley Cyrus concert banned on morality grounds in the Dominican Republic
Britain's ugliest buildings: Which monstrosities should be nominated for the Dead Prize?
American film board gives gay film Love Is Strange R-rating despite no sex or violence
Richard Dawkins on babies with Down Syndrome: 'Abort it and try again – it would be immoral to bring it into the world'
Scottish independence: English people overwhelmingly want Scotland to stay in the UK
Isis threat: Cameron wants an alliance with Iran
Michael Brown shooting: Chaos erupts on the streets of Ferguson after autopsy shows teenager was shot six times – twice in the head
Bin bag full of cats' heads discovered near Manchester's Curry Mile
Disgusting, frustrating, but intriguing: how the country really feels about its politicians