"Stunning. Hot. Sexually charged... Well, that was my date. The movie was OK."
"One of the worst films I've seen in a while: some funny lines, but I nearly walked out a third of the way through it."
"Thankfully in real life this woman would probably be fired within 48 hours."
"Anything with Cameron Diaz is good even if it's rubbish!"
"I think Cameron Diaz made this for a bet."
"Poor excuse for a movie! What on earth were they thinking?"
Pári Heáther Zádeh
"The 'genius' of the plot is that Cameron Diaz fancies Justin Timberlake and you'll never guess what, right, in REAL life too... brilliant, innit?"
"Money-making trash... again."
"Look no further than South Park's Cartman for Diaz's inspiration here."
"Blonde beauty? She's ruined her looks with whatever she's had done to her cheeks."
"C'mon – she's an actress for goodness sake. Is anything she does on screen anything other than that? This is just publicity stuff. Can we get on with real life now?"
"Bad Teacher isn't funny enough to make the grade."
"Don't even bother renting it."
Next week in Culture Club: Glastonbury
Please email your views on this year's festival, with a star line-up including Beyoncé, U2, Coldplay, Paul Simon, Plan B and Tinie Tempah, to Cultureclub@independent.co.uk. The best will be published next Thursday