The Forbidden Kingdom (12A)

The producers seem to have reckoned that, given their USP, trivial things like a story hardly mattered.

You can see their reasoning: Jackie Chan meets Jet Li is about as U as SPs come, and their big fight is decently choreographed, if not quite the epic you might have expected. But that doesn't excuse the slapped-together plot – part Wizard of Oz, part Monkey (the old Japanese TV series about an immortal monkey king) – and the depressing absence of character development: where once the teenage protagonist would have learned some lessons about home, or loyalty, or truth, here all he learns is how to kick butt.