Music: To A Critic Turned Pop Star
Friday 28 May 1999
You've burnt your boats my beauty
Dropped quill and donned guitar
The scribe springs from the closet
She wants to be a star
How dare you cross the border
Imagine how they'll feel
Your colleagues and your readers
The day you ink that deal
The tape recorder's running
You're going to have to busk it
A workmate whets his dagger
Another primes his musket
The crossbows wound-up ready
The bolts removed from quivers
Cold and scary ain't it?
Sebastian stands and shivers
As muttering in the shadows
They wait for you to fail
With all the love of convicts
For coppers sent to jail
Musicians may be jaundiced
And subsequently rude
But is it any wonder
They're spitting in your food?
Like any thirsty punters
They want to cause you trouble
The barman who's ignored them
Just served himself a double
Unless of course you're brilliant
Chalk hits up by the score
For then, the case is altered
They'll hate you even more.
Jeff Fletcher found fame in 1990s
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