Once you've read it, you'll wonder how you lived without it

Four Professions Used Indiscriminately by Taxi Drivers: Governor, Squire, Boss, Vicar
Ten Things We Don't See Around Much Any More,

If At All

Ley lines

Programmes about bridge

on TV

Cigarette-holders

Squashed plastic tomatoes

on the front of cars

Blancmange

Canasta

Chicken Maryland

The cha cha cha

People's names printed in

large letters on car wind-

screens such as KEVIN

and TRACEY

Mild ale

Nine Things With Names

Derived From Their Native Country

Polonaise

Chinoiserie

Turquoise

Suede

Japanning

Spaniel

Schottische

Arabesque

Allemande

Nine People Who Seem To Have No Surnames, Only

First Names

Susan George

Clive James

Jack Benny

Lenny Henry

Barry Norman

Dick Francis

Sid James

George Graham

Charlie George

Eight Places Named

After Hats

Fez

Homburg

Derby

Panama

Balaclava

Balmoral

Astrakhan

Glengarry

Seven Medical Terms

And Words They Should

Never Be Confused With

Fistula / the Vistula

Urethra / Aretha

ENT / ENO

Malaise / Malays

Obese / OBEUs

Lumbago / Plumbago

Placenta / Play Centre

Seven English Phrases

In Which, Most Unusually,

The Adjective Comes AFTER The Noun

Park Royal

Prince Charming

Body Beautiful

God Almighty

Penny Black

Penny Dreadful

Mount Pleasant

Six Dishes Which Might

Feature On Our Menus

If Everything Had To Be

Written In English

Beef in crust

Sailors' mussels

Paste of fat liver

Good woman sole

Crunch-mister

Lovely Helen's pears

Six People Who Did Not,

Unlike Calvin Klein, Make

Underpants

Kevin Kline

Kelvin McKenzie

Kevin Keegan

Calvin Coolidge

Chester Kalman

Kenneth Clarke

Five People Who Seem

To Have Only Surnames,

And No First Names

Bamber Gascoigne

Menzies Campbell

Stirling Moss

Timberlake Wertenbaker

Lewis Wolpert

Four Professions Used

Indiscriminately By

Taxi Drivers To Address

Their Fares

Governor

Squire

Boss

Vicar

Three Awards With

First Names But

No Surnames

Oscar

Emmy

Tony

Two Pairs Of Words We Wish Had Never Been Joined

HarperCollins

Travelodge

The Bill Clinton Prize

For Not Being Any Better

Than He Ought To Be

Will Carling

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