Pandora

ATTACKS BY armed pirates rose 122 per cent during 1997098, according to the International Maritime Bureau. More than half happened in or around the South China Sea. Marauders completed most raids in less than 30 minutes. Fewer than 5 per cent of the attacks resulted in arrest.

BOY LOVES girl. Girl loves boy. Boy leaves girl for car... yes, only in America would a man try to marry his car. He's from Knoxville in (surprise, surprise) Tennessee and answers to "Buster Mitchell". His auto erotic love object is a 1996 Mustang GT. Court officials have just refused the 28-year-old permission to plight his troth with the vehicle in a civil ceremony, according to the current issue of Details. A mouthpiece from Ford telephoned Buster and offered to collect the car if he would reunite with his girl. Last time we looked, he hadn't.

GENDER BLUR - the numbers say that sex chromosome abnormalities happen in as many as one birth in 450. If there are some 56 million people on these shores... you do the maths.

FELIX DENNIS, the maverick millionaire publisher and techno entrepreneur, surprised Periodical Publishers Association delegates with the suggestion he may sell his stable of more than 20 magazines because, inter alia, of the i/net. Dennis (pictured) is millennially paradoxical. Commercially, he plays hardball; in private life, he's open-handed. He loves Britain, but spends much of his time in New York and Mustique. He reportedly craves political influence (and has been invited to Downing Street), yet remains openly contemptuous of the 20th-century Establishment. Oh, and Felix - Pandora has a newsbreak for you: Gill Hudson, the woman behind the success of your flagship mag Maxim, is resigning. She's been head-hunted by the BBC to whip its magazine division into shape.

RUSS MEYER, the legendary 77-year-old skinflick auteur, has filed for a restraining order against Debra Masson, his 39-year-old live-in lover, claiming that she beat him up over the weekend. LAPD arrested the former stripper, who's currently behind bars on spousal abuse charges waiting for someone to post her $10,000 bail.

GET ME REWRITE Dept. "Editing isn't rocket science. It's much harder," writes Roy Greenslade this week on page two of The Guardian's alleged media bit: "Okay, so Sun editor David Yelland made one of the biggest bloomers in modern tabloid history. It was not the first error and it won't be the last." Readers who turned to page five may have been surprised to read that the piece continued: "Okay, so Sun editor David Yelland made one of the biggest bloomers in modern tabloid history. It was not the first error and it won't be the last." You said it, Roy.

CIGAR BAR etiquette: "When a big shot lights his cigar with a pounds 20 note," suggests Glenn O'Brien, the hack, "match up by lighting yours with a pounds 1,000 cheque."

THE SHIREBOUND shower who comprise The Daily Telegraph's readership had the wool pulled over their collective noggin this week. "In his first British interview since the flop of Absolute Beginners, Julian Temple tells Jim Shelley about his new film." Fact: Independent readers read Julian Temple's first British interview (and yes, about his new film) - with John Walsh - here a full five days earlier.

SCRATCH'N'SNIFF CDs open a plethora of possibilities for music biz marketeers. But imagine consumer confusion in stores if record companies proceed with plans to let us smell out our favourite choons. For openers, try: Garbage (garbage), Frankie Knuckles (new car smell), The Beatles (apple), Bananarama (also fruity), the Prodigy (Zip firestarters), The Barenaked Ladies (tangy aroma of scoop du jour?)

THE NEW Varsity sport? Pooh Sticks may be upgraded to quarter blue status, and there could be an Oxford vs Cambridge contest this summer. Pandora says: "It's not cricket."

Contact Pandora by e-mail: pandora@ independent. co.uk

PROMOTED VIDEO
Arts and Entertainment
Judd Apatow’s make-it-up-as-you-go-along approach is ideal for comedies about stoners and slackers slouching towards adulthood
filmWith comedy film audiences shrinking, it’s time to move on
Arts and Entertainment
booksForget the Man Booker longlist, Literary Editor Katy Guest offers her alternative picks
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Arts and Entertainment
Off set: Bab El Hara
tvTV series are being filmed outside the country, but the influence of the regime is still being felt
Arts and Entertainment
Red Bastard: Where self-realisation is delivered through monstrous clowning and audience interaction
comedy
Arts and Entertainment
O'Shaughnessy pictured at the Unicorn Theatre in London
tvFiona O'Shaughnessy explains where she ends and her strange and wonderful character begins
Arts and Entertainment
The new characters were announced yesterday at San Diego Comic Con

TV
Arts and Entertainment
Rhino Doodle by Jim Carter (Downton Abbey)

TV
Arts and Entertainment
No Devotion's Geoff Rickly and Stuart Richardson
musicReview: No Devotion, O2 Academy Islington, London
Arts and Entertainment
Christian Grey cradles Ana in the Fifty Shades of Grey film

film
Arts and Entertainment
Comedian 'Weird Al' Yankovic

Is the comedy album making a comeback?

comedy
Arts and Entertainment
While many films were released, few managed to match the success of James Bond blockbuster 'Skyfall'
film
Arts and Entertainment
Jamie Dornan as Christian Grey in the first-look Fifty Shades of Grey movie still

film
Arts and Entertainment
Sue Perkins and Mel Giedroyc, centre, are up for Best Female TV Comic for their presenting quips on The Great British Bake Off

TV
Arts and Entertainment
Martin Freeman as Lester Nygaard in the TV adaptation of 'Fargo'

TV
Arts and Entertainment
A scene from Shakespeare in Love at the Noel Coward Theatre
theatreReview: Shakespeare in Love has moments of sheer stage poetry mixed with effervescent fun
Arts and Entertainment
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson stars in Hercules

film
Arts and Entertainment
Standing the test of time: Michael J Fox and Christopher Lloyd in 'Back to the Future'

film
Arts and Entertainment
<p><strong>2008</strong></p>
<p>Troubled actor Robert Downey Jr cements his comeback from drug problems by bagging the lead role in Iron Man. Two further films follow</p>

film
Arts and Entertainment

theatre
Arts and Entertainment
Tycoons' text: Warren Buffett and Bill Gates both cite John Brookes' 'Business Adventures' as their favourite book

books
Independent
Travel Shop
the manor
Up to 70% off luxury travel
on city breaks Find out more
santorini
Up to 70% off luxury travel
on chic beach resorts Find out more
sardina foodie
Up to 70% off luxury travel
on country retreats Find out more
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?

ES Rentals

    Independent Dating
    and  

    By clicking 'Search' you
    are agreeing to our
    Terms of Use.

    A new Russian revolution: Cracks start to appear in Putin’s Kremlin power bloc

    A new Russian revolution

    Cracks start to appear in Putin’s Kremlin power bloc
    Eugene de Kock: Apartheid’s sadistic killer that his country cannot forgive

    Apartheid’s sadistic killer that his country cannot forgive

    The debate rages in South Africa over whether Eugene de Kock should ever be released from jail
    Standing my ground: If sitting is bad for your health, what happens when you stay on your feet for a whole month?

    Standing my ground

    If sitting is bad for your health, what happens when you stay on your feet for a whole month?
    Commonwealth Games 2014: Dai Greene prays for chance to rebuild after injury agony

    Greene prays for chance to rebuild after injury agony

    Welsh hurdler was World, European and Commonwealth champion, but then the injuries crept in
    Israel-Gaza conflict: Secret report helps Israelis to hide facts

    Patrick Cockburn: Secret report helps Israel to hide facts

    The slickness of Israel's spokesmen is rooted in directions set down by pollster Frank Luntz
    The man who dared to go on holiday

    The man who dared to go on holiday

    New York's mayor has taken a vacation - in a nation that has still to enforce paid leave, it caused quite a stir, reports Rupert Cornwell
    Best comedians: How the professionals go about their funny business, from Sarah Millican to Marcus Brigstocke

    Best comedians: How the professionals go about their funny business

    For all those wanting to know how stand-ups keep standing, here are some of the best moments
    The Guest List 2014: Forget the Man Booker longlist, Literary Editor Katy Guest offers her alternative picks

    The Guest List 2014

    Forget the Man Booker longlist, Literary Editor Katy Guest offers her alternative picks
    Jokes on Hollywood: 'With comedy film audiences shrinking, it’s time to move on'

    Jokes on Hollywood

    With comedy film audiences shrinking, it’s time to move on
    It's the best of British art... but not all is on display

    It's the best of British art... but not all is on display

    Voted for by the British public, the artworks on Art Everywhere posters may be the only place where they can be seen
    Critic claims 'I was the inspiration for Blanche DuBois'

    Critic claims 'I was the inspiration for Blanche DuBois'

    Blanche Marvin reveals how Tennessee Williams used her name and an off-the-cuff remark to create an iconic character
    Sometimes it's hard to be a literary novelist

    Sometimes it's hard to be a literary novelist

    Websites offering your ebooks for nothing is only the latest disrespect the modern writer is subjected to, says DJ Taylor
    Edinburgh Fringe 2014: The comedy highlights, from Bridget Christie to Jack Dee

    Edinburgh Fringe 2014

    The comedy highlights, from Bridget Christie to Jack Dee
    Dame Jenny Abramsky: 'We have to rethink. If not, museums and parks will close'

    Dame Jenny Abramsky: 'We have to rethink. If not, museums and parks will close'

    The woman stepping down as chair of the Heritage Lottery Fund is worried