SUPERMODELS' TALENT prices move faster than 40,000 speeding gazelles. A mannequin's average rate per show is pounds 20,000 in Manhattan, pounds 15,000 to pounds 30,000 in Milan and pounds 0 in London. Yes, zero. Elle contends that the startling fiscal gap during London Fashion Week is due to "kudos by association".
If Jeffrey told me it was Tuesday, I'd check my watch." Steven Norris, that master of the mattress, shares his special warm feelings for Jeffrey Archer with the rest of us.
TELL ME it's just a coincidence: Liam Gallagher's son Lennon has the same birthday as Ringo Starr's son Zak Starkey. And, oh, Liz Hurley is said to have been approached to be Lennon's godmother.
Australia's no place to be agoraphobic. Any kind of social phobia, it seems, could prove distinctly dodgy down under. The anxiety research unit at Sydney's Macquarie University treats the compulsively shy using... group therapy.
IT'S SHOWTIME! was billed as a big, themed restaurant on Shaftesbury Avenue. Jenny Seagrove, Tom Conti and Maureen Lipman were three star names attached. "It's supposed to have been opening for the past year or so," says a player at Entertainment News, the event forward planning service, "but we don't know what's happening about it." This year? Next year? Some time? Never? Rampant amnesia and unanswered calls were the response of the PRs for the venture that, like so many in the thesping business, seems to be "resting". The stars' agents hadn't returned calls by deadline. Sometimes "No comment" is a comment, isn't it?
John Reid, the talent manager who made headlines when he and Elton John hit Split City, is selling one of the artiste's gold discs at Christie's South Kensington on 30 September. Which would that be, then? Pandora wonders if it might be Don't Go Breaking My Heart.
HOW DO you make heartbreak disappear? Ask David Copperfield, the prestidigitator, who was dumped by fiancee Claudia Schiffer for Tim Jeffries. Copperfield was seen the other night at a Manhattan boite. It was a saucer of milk moment: "He looked awful, 20lb heavier, and without his usual fake tan, his make-up or his standard poofy hair-do," one reveller bitched. "Flat hair, flabby stomach, and pale. It was a sorry sight."
Finger-snapping Paul McKenna has a new starring role - as the in-house hypnotist at Congress House in Bloomsbury. He rents space at the TUC's London HQ to run hypnotism courses. Perhaps this explains the block vote?
THE ONLY thing missing from Geordie Greig's glittering party to launch Louis and the Prince, his new book about the friendship between his grandfather and George VI, were his old muckers from The Sunday Times book pages. Before winning the editorship of Tatler this summer, Greig looked after the newspaper's literary affairs. But his bash was on Tuesday - Greig's successor Caroline Gascoyne's press day.
AA GILL has a reputation of not being the number one fan of Germans as a group of people. So, guess which territory was the first to buy the rights to his novel Star Crossed? Ja. Gill, on form at his friend Greig's bash, was asked about his Caesaresque haircut. "My barber's called Tailor - but when you think about it, it should be the other way round." firstname.lastname@example.org