Pop: Lyric Sheets
Friday 18 September 1998
Pop Stars' Pensions
Direct debit Elephants' Graveyard
The end of The Yellow Brick Road
Where the man from The Pru
Rings a man from the Who
To ask for his sorting code
The sensible matter of pensions
For the short-lived supremos of rock
Where you call Sun Life
Cos your second wife
Wants the giveaway radio clock
When it's time for a personal pension
And the game's moved on up the field
Should you quell your fears
Buying `added years'
To top up the main-scheme yield?
Should you take up a hobby like gardening
Bid adieu to the world of Mammon
When a gram of toot's
For a nice bit of sockeye salmon?
If you want to move into `Dungiggin'
At the end of a brilliant career
You should have enough cash
For the Rotary bash
On a 9 per cent growth rate per year.
For the keenest of fans will stop coming
And the comedown's too awful to mention
Stadium to radium
Via London Palladium
Pity the star with no pension.
Review: Cilla, ITV TV
To mark Tolstoy's 186th birthdaybooks
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 Scottish independence: Ireland since 1919 is a lesson for Scotland in what a Yes vote means
- 2 Thailand deaths: Pair's bloodied bodies found naked on Koh Tao beach
- 3 Lego breaks out of the toy box and heads for the gallery
- 4 Vogue under fire for 'Big Booty' article
- 5 Julian Assange and Edward Snowden join piracy mogul Kim Dotcom’s political campaign in New Zealand
Fifty Shades of Grey movie: New picture of Anastasia Steele unveiled
Lego breaks out of the toy box and heads for the gallery
Cilla, ITV, review: Sheridan Smith embodies the young singer perfectly
Doctor Who, Listen, review: Possibly Steven Moffat's most terrifying episode
Tyler, The Creator says having new U2 album automatically downloaded on his iPhone was 'like waking up with herpes'
Daniele Watts: Django Unchained actress detained by Los Angeles police after being mistaken for a prostitute
The political class is doing what Hitler couldn’t – destroying Britain
Scottish independence: Nationalist leader Jim Sillars threatens pro-union companies with 'day of reckoning' after independence
Scottish independence: Yes campaign feels the heat as Alex Salmond's NHS claims come under furious attack
£23m Birmingham cycle scheme is attacked by Tory councillor for not catering to the elderly
Salmond accused of laughing off national debt with ‘what are they going to do: invade?’ joke