Restaurants: Christmas Kitsch

Walthamstow Stadium

Chingford Rd, London E4 (0181-531 4255)

Greyhound heaven has chips, a pint of lager, race admission and a pounds 1 betting voucher, all for a fiver.

La Pergola

66 Streatham High Rd, London SW16 (0181-769 2646)

Elvis brightens weekends and suffers sexual incursion from drunken hen parties.

RS Hispaniola

Victoria Embankment, London WC2 (0171-839 3011)

Boat-based jollies from pounds 19 a head, with belly dancers, magicians and bad music.

Salsa!

96 Charing Cross Rd, London WC2 (0171-379 3277)

pounds 13.50 a head for tapas; falling over and thinking you're a sex bomb is free.

Brick Lane Music Hall

134-146 Curtain Rd, London EC2 (0171-739 9997)

pounds 28.50 a head for three courses and a panto - Jack and His Giant Stalk is the choice this year.