Dying hard on screenAfter appearing on The One Show last week to promote A Good Day to Die Hard, the latest film in the Die Hard series, viewers were less than impressed with Bruce Willis. He later told UK radio station Xfm he was jetlagged: "I have to apologise...I didn't get very many compliments about it. They said it was a little stale. But I was so jetlagged. I'm very sorry, you kids on The One Show...I'm sure it's not their problem. I was a little bit boring, I think. I had a little sinking spell, that's all."
A basic instinct to look awayA female presenter brought the Serbian prime minister up short by doing a Sharon Stone style flash of her private parts. The Serbian premier is obviously taken aback by the stunt set up by Candid Camera style show ‘Mission Impossible’, but in true politician style manages to stumble on, albeit with a rather dreamy smile on his face.
The Bee Gees walk out on Clive Anderson
It starts with the Bee Gees admitting that they used to be called ‘Les Tosseurs’.“You’ll always be Les Tosseurs to me” quips the chat show host. Then when he claims to like Robin Gibb’s solo effort but not to remember a song released by the other two brothers at the same time, Barry Gibb walks out saying: “You’re the tosser pal.”
Kerry Katona on This Morning
She turns up late. She’s talking unnaturally slowly. She’s slurring her words. Eventually Phillip Schofield feels compelled to point out the fact that she doesn’t seem right. Kerry blames it on the medication...
Tom Cruise ‘love-struck’ on Oprah
He seemed to be rather too happy from the start, alternately dropping to his knees and punching the air. “It’s too much,” cries Oprah, vocalising what we are all thinking. ‘What’s happened to you?” She says. “I’m in love!” he cries jumping around, punching the air a bit more and randomly grappling Oprah by the shoulders. In the light of the subsequent break-up, could this have been a teensy-weensy case of protesting too much?
Preston walks out on Never Mind the Buzzcocks
The moment when Buzzcocks presenter Simon Amstell’s bullying style of hosting turned around to bite him on the backside, possibly. Preston was fresh from his Celebrity Big Brother appearance and his shotgun wedding to winner Chantelle Houghton. The last thing he wanted was dig after dig about the brainless vacuity of his new wife you would imagine, and you’d be right. As Amstell quoted passage after unrelenting embarrassing passage from Chantelle’s autobiography, Preston’s stare slowly hardened until he could take it no more and “Maybe he thinks he’s been voted off,” said Bill Bailey and picked out a replacement ‘Preston’ from the audience who turned out, thankfully, to be less wooden than the real thing.
Oliver Reed on anything
He ‘sang’, sozzled on Aspel. He said the word ‘cock’ without referring to poultry on the Des O’connor show. He ran amok on The Word where they secretly filmed him drinking in his dressing room before the show. When Clive James asked him why he drank, he said: “Because the finest people I’ve ever met were in a pub.” Fair enough.
Meg Ryan on Parkinson.
Parkinson’s unusually aggressive questioning throws Ryan a on the defensive. Parky reacts by pointing out her icy body language. The conversation becomes more and more awkward with longer uncomfortable silences. A desperate Parky asks what she would do in his situation. “Wrap it up,” says Ryan to ironic applause.
Richard Madeley’s Ali G impression
Daytime television legend, other half of Richard and Judy and serial putter of foot in mouth, Richard Madeley dressed up as Ali G on ITV’s This Morning. “Aaaiiiee” says Richard as Judy, not for the first time, squirms in the background. The scariest thing was that he really did look like the Staines-based rapper.
Angus Deayton gets mauled on Have I Got News for You
He had been in the press earlier in the week for allegedly taking cocaine and seeing prostitutes. He was soon to be sacked by the BBC for it, but first he had to go through the on-screen hell of Paul Merton and Ian Hislop’s endless gibes.
BBC interviews the wrong guy
BBC News 24 presenter Karen Bowerman introduces “Guy Kewney, the editor of the technology website, News Wireless.” The look on the face of taxi driver Guy Goma, who is actually there for a job interview, is priceless. “Are you surprised to see this verdict?” asks Karen. “I’m very surprised to see this verdict come on me,” says Guy and you can see he isn’t kidding. He soldiers on bravely though and ends up giving a.better interview than many other ‘experts’.