Surely this had to be the episode where Sophia and Francis got together. Sadly it wasn’t. We can only hope those MIC producers are saving that happy ending until the Christmas special.
Francis vicariously lives his non-existent relationship with Sophia through Ashley. He takes her to a modern art gallery, but sadly Ashley does not seem to share his love of contemporary art. Ashley confides her two hobbies are running and hunting.
It transpires the two have a mutually exclusive affiliation with rabbits. Ashley was scared of them as a child when her dad used to shoot them and throw them in the back of their Landrover; Francis once had a boarding school business hiring out bunnies for hugs. “We seem to have a lot in common, a strange amount,” she says.
Francis asks her if she knows "that Andy Warhol of two people kissing" and asks her if she wants him to demonstrate on her. Continuing the conceit the two kiss in front of a contemporary collage with a figure holding the sign “love is the answer”.
But Francis is no closer to answers, especially when he finds out from Jamie that Sophia and Proudlock have broken up. Cue Sophia pouting, sitting on a bench in the deserted streets of Chelsea looking lonely. Francis skateboards up to her in square glasses, hoodie and tartan jacket (is it really this obvious he's trying to be Proudlock?). She comes close to telling him she broke up with Proudlock to be with him, but doesn’t.
Luckily all is not forlorn in SW3 as Mark Francis decides to host a “50s glamour” party. His main concern is whether to serve red wine or champagne, and that people will turn up dressed like Marilyn Monroe in which case he declares, “I’m just going to heave”.
Chelsea’s finest diva starts off his party by singing some plummy notes into the microphone, accompanied by band The Gypsy Queens. His smooth rendition of L’Americano really gets the party started….
Binky, looking tanned and sultry as ever, admits to Jamie she slept with Andy. Jamie then takes it upon himself to tell Andy off for something he basically did about eight episodes ago. He tells Andy: “You saw how badly I treated Binky and you go and take it one step further. You knew my history with Binky and you still did it. Don’t be a pussy at this point and walk away.” Double standards are running high Jamie.
Jamie continues his cheeky chappy irritant vein by telling Louise he always hears Spencer complain about her neediness after they speak on the phone. Louise denies Spencer ever says that, to which Jamie manipulates into telling her: “You say my best friend is lying to me about your relationship?” This cad cannot go on. But then he does. “It seems so unhealthy. There’s such an obsession with your relationship it’s bound for disaster.”
That disaster strikes when Lucy- who we see previously in the episode trying on a dress, very smug that her boobs look good despite not wearing a push-up bra- asks Spencer for his number. He casually gives it to her, and it does seem quite unsuspicious with an air of something that could develop.
Unfortunately Louise more or less spies him in the act and the two have a show down. Louise says to him after her chat with Jamie: “It was news to me our relationship was a complete disaster. That’s how you’ve been relaying it.” Spencer tries to reason with her that he thinks it has been quite intense between them and he is sorry for not telling her to her face, but it is too late. Louise walks off teary eyed, and even Spencer’s eyes don’t look dry as he looks over in Lucy’s direction.
Spoilers from next week’s episode show even more tears as Ollie and Gabriella stand in floods telling each other how much they still want to be friends after they slept together. Francis gets Sophia a toy bear, but the two don’t look any closer to getting together, while Millie slaps Spencer - presumably about Louise saying: “This is what you’ve f***ing done to her”.
And if you can’t wait till next week there’s a Made in Chelsea Come Dine With Me special tomorrow night on Channel 4. Will Jamie be eating a dish best served cold?
Made in Chelsea Series 4, Episode 10 aired on December 17 on E4 at 10pm.