Andrew Martin

Journalist and novelist Andrew Martin is the author of the 'Jim Stringer' series of novels based around railways. He has written for the Independent on Sunday, the Evening Standard, the Sunday Times and the New Statesman among others.

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A man's world

IN SOUTHWOLD, Suffolk, last week I stood on the beach and pitched my automatic watch into the seething sea.

Football: Woodman defies Hammers

West Ham United 1 Northampton Town 0 Northampton win 2-1 on agg

Man's World

TODAY'S COLUMN is addressed to any bloke in his late twenties/early thirties reading this over a leisurely pint in a pub. Yes, that means you, with your Marlboro Lights and stubbly chin. I'll call you John.

Football: Dons douse Hammers' early joy

West Ham United 3 Wimbledon 4

Man's World

Whilst scanning a list of winners of "Pipeman of the Year" the other day, I couldn't help thinking that the possibility of being the hippest person ever to smoke a pipe lay within my grasp. After all, the nearest thing to a young man on that list is Dave Lee Travis (triumphant in 1982), and the nearest thing to a rock star is James Galway, whose outstanding pipemanship was given the recognition it so richly deserved in 1985. I know that any minute now there's going to be a picture in a style section of some dude with a thrusting briar in his clenched jaw, accompanied by the words: "The pipe is back!" Why shouldn't that jaw be mine?

Man's World

I HAVE a fear of numbers which extends beyond being unable to do simple maths to being unable to read profiles of mathematicians. This means I've got a terrible headache already simply from writing: Professors Borcherds and Gowers recently won acclaim for their work in vertex algebras and Banach Space.

Thomas the Tank Engine stole my son

Was the Rev W. Awdry related to L. Ron Hubbard? Those little engines are not just part of a harmless children's story, they're part of a cult. And it's taken over my family

Irritations of Modern Life 10: Televised Sport In Pubs

I REALISED the extent of the televised-sport-in-pubs disease about a year ago when I walked into my local to find the entire clientele watching a bodybuilder in sparse underpants who was flexing his muscles and mincing around to an anonymous piece of heavy metal. "A good performance from the Finn, there," breathed the commentator when the man eventually finished.

Real Living: Man's World

"WHAT you need," said my wife as I sat sighing in the kitchen last Sunday, "is a hobby."

Football: pounds 10m bid for Yorke rejected by Villa

ASTON VILLA continued to shrug off the unwelcome advances of Manchester United for Dwight Yorke yesterday, after they rejected what they have described as United's second and final faxed offer of pounds 10m for the striker.
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