Deborah Ross writes the "If you ask me..." column for i. She also writes for The Daily Mail.
02 July 2012 08:00 PM
30 June 2012 12:00 AM
In the five years the Channel 4 programme Embarrassing Bodies has been running on television, I believe I have witnessed all of the following: asymmetrical breasts, hirsute nipples, lactating males, scalps spraying pus, extreme hernias, angry rashes, boils, rotting teeth, impacted ear wax, leaking bladders, monster-sized labias, rotting armpits, that woman who pushed her prolapsed rectum out of her anus – which has yet to catch on as a party trick, weirdly – vaginal tears, a massive vagina (with echo), asymmetrical testicles, penile warts, bent penises, buried penises, penises that popped to the corner shop for milk and were never seen again, which is always sad, and although there has yet to be a penis-shaped-like-balloon-art-sausage-dog, I'm secretly hoping it is only a matter of time.
28 June 2012 12:00 AM
If you ask me...
25 June 2012 08:00 PM
20 June 2012 08:00 PM
If you ask me, I would like to tell you a story, which I suggest you take as a warning. This is a story about a mother whose son comes home from his first year at university for the summer. The mother is quite shocked at his appearance, as he is thin and peaky, and looks as if he has been doing what he has been doing: that is, living on economy squash and reduced-price bread so he can better spend his overdraft on drink, clubbing, drugs and a new T-shirt that looks like all his other T-shirts.
19 June 2012 10:00 AM
If You Ask Me: Wicked Denmark was engulfed by a tempest of those traditional family values
12 June 2012 12:00 AM
07 June 2012 12:00 AM
If you ask me...
05 June 2012 12:00 AM
29 May 2012 12:00 AM
Disgruntled RBS worker writes hilarious open letter to Russell Brand after anti-capitalist publicity stunt leaves him hungry
Nigel Farage defends Kerry Smith 'ch***y' comment: 'If you are going for a Chinese, what do you say you’re going for?'
Nigel Farage's approval rating hits 'record low' as popularity suffers in wake of Ukip sex scandal
Pakistan school attack live: Taliban kill at least 132 children in 'horrifying' massacre
Sony hack: Angelina Jolie branded 'seriously out of her mind' in further embarrassing leaked email saga
Panic Saturday: 13 million Britons spend £1.2bn – while 13 million others across the country live in poverty unable to afford food
- 1 Nigel Farage: Me vs Russell Brand on Question Time – he's got the chest hair but where are his ideas?
- 2 Harry Potter fans can apply to the Hogwarts-inspired College of Wizardry
- 3 Jessica Chambers: 19-year-old woman 'doused with lighter fluid and burned alive' in the US
- 4 Russell Brand calls Nigel Farage 'poundshop Enoch Powell' in BBC Question Time debate
- 5 Orange Wednesdays are no more