Deborah Ross writes the "If you ask me..." column for i. She also writes for The Daily Mail.
30 June 2012 12:00 AM
In the five years the Channel 4 programme Embarrassing Bodies has been running on television, I believe I have witnessed all of the following: asymmetrical breasts, hirsute nipples, lactating males, scalps spraying pus, extreme hernias, angry rashes, boils, rotting teeth, impacted ear wax, leaking bladders, monster-sized labias, rotting armpits, that woman who pushed her prolapsed rectum out of her anus – which has yet to catch on as a party trick, weirdly – vaginal tears, a massive vagina (with echo), asymmetrical testicles, penile warts, bent penises, buried penises, penises that popped to the corner shop for milk and were never seen again, which is always sad, and although there has yet to be a penis-shaped-like-balloon-art-sausage-dog, I'm secretly hoping it is only a matter of time.
28 June 2012 12:00 AM
If you ask me...
25 June 2012 08:00 PM
20 June 2012 08:00 PM
If you ask me, I would like to tell you a story, which I suggest you take as a warning. This is a story about a mother whose son comes home from his first year at university for the summer. The mother is quite shocked at his appearance, as he is thin and peaky, and looks as if he has been doing what he has been doing: that is, living on economy squash and reduced-price bread so he can better spend his overdraft on drink, clubbing, drugs and a new T-shirt that looks like all his other T-shirts.
19 June 2012 10:00 AM
If You Ask Me: Wicked Denmark was engulfed by a tempest of those traditional family values
12 June 2012 12:00 AM
07 June 2012 12:00 AM
If you ask me...
05 June 2012 12:00 AM
29 May 2012 12:00 AM
24 May 2012 12:00 AM
Britain's top vet sparks controversy with call for ban on slashing animals' throats in 'ritual' slaughters for halal and kosher meat products
Ukraine crisis: Russia dismisses '3am ultimatum' as 'total nonsense'
If you're horrified by a flame-roasted dog, you should be shocked at a hog roast
Poor 'live like animals' says Boris's privately educated sister after going on 'poverty safari'
White people become less racist just by moving to more diverse areas, study finds
Exclusive: Impact of immigrants on British workers ‘negligible’
- 1 International Women's Day 2014: The shocking statistics that show why it is still so important
- 2 Orgasm machine to deliver climax at the push of a button
- 3 Teacher shows sex tape featuring herself to pupils during class by mistake
- 4 Singapore sting: Sky-high prices are pushing locals to the edge of affordability
- 5 Liam Neeson turned down James Bond role because late wife Natasha Richardson said she wouldn't marry him if he took it