Donald MacInnes writes Tales from the Water Cooler, which can be found every Saturday on page 2 of i. And, although a financial near-imbecile, he writes a weekly column in The Independent’s Money section, also on Saturdays. He writes regularly on a broad range of subjects in i’s Freeview section and occasionally fills in on Simon Kelner’s daily column when emotionally up to it. @DonaldAMacInnes
23 January 2015 08:00 PM
People assume, because my writing appears in a quality national newspaper (and its slick website), that I must be held accountable for my opinions. Even if those opinions were only ever meant to provide light relief from the news, people still take me far too seriously.
17 January 2015 12:00 AM
Ah, January. A month among months. Named, obviously, after the Viking god Janus, who brought stability to the 12 warring kingdoms by inventing the world's first self-service checkout.
10 January 2015 12:00 AM
In a final act of post-festive laziness, I intend to take one last look at the best of last year's columns. If that's okay with you…
02 January 2015 06:22 PM
Welcome to another seasonal “Best of In the Red”. I do hope Santa was good to you and you managed to get through the holiday without any fairy light-based violence.
19 December 2014 07:30 PM
As I dictate these words to my long-time stenographer, Mrs Cooper, I am reclining on my sick bed, its inert, Bauhaus-inspired lines interrupted and, to my shame, very much corrupted by the gothic filigree flourishes of – and there is really no way of putting this elegantly – my hardened snot.
12 December 2014 05:28 PM
Two recent events made me very, very angry.
06 December 2014 12:00 AM
Somewhere in the minds of each of those people who share your bloodline or your name, there resides a number. This figure represents an amount of money that these people – your family, basically – are prepared to spend on you at Christmas. (This is assuming that both they and you follow either the Judao-Christian perception of Christmas, or the more economically fluid Argos-Amazon translation.)
29 November 2014 12:00 AM
Why are we at all surprised when, at this time of year, we go through money like a canoe through water? Since when was Christmas anything at all to do with good financial sense?
14 November 2014 05:41 PM
Judging by the literally no emails my secretary Karen received while I was off, you welcomed my break from The Independent as much as I did.
01 November 2014 12:00 AM
Being as I am (with a nod to AA Milne) a bear of the very littlest brain, the words "think-tank" suggest nothing more to me than my current military-fixated state of mind.
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