Virginia Ironside

Virginia Ironside is an agony aunt, columnist and author. She writes the weekly Dilemmas column for The Independent.

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Virginia Ironside's Dilemmas: Does my depressed boyfriend deserve better?

"It has hardly anything to do with you whether the other person gets better or not."

What should I do about my rude brother-in-law?

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: What should I do about my intolerable brother-in-law?

"He is obviously a very damaged, sad little man, and anyone who has a close relationship with his wife seems to him to be incredibly threatening."

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: Should I change the funeral date at my stepmother's request?

"You’re the one who matters in all of this, so don’t even think twice about it"

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: Could I go back to drinking moderately?

"I suspect that if you went back to drinking “moderately”, before you knew it you’d be back on the two bottles a night"

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: A friend of mine made a pass at my husband

"I wouldn’t let her know how angry you are – expressions of emotion give away your vulnerability – be icy cool instead"

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: I can't deal with my neighbour's problems

"I know that in an ideal world we should be able to dispense sympathy and kindness to everyone, but some people are more difficult to help than others"

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: Working together has affected our friendship

"She has clearly got the wrong end of the stick about your financial arrangements, and doesn’t value the history of your friendship enough to explain herself"

Virginia Ironside's dilemmas: My son doesn't want my help any more

"He probably genuinely wants to be caring towards his old mum, and imagines that your offering to help him move is some kind of penance"

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