You hardly need to look at the date on the front of the papers to know what time of the year it is: transport strikes in continental Europe; a last icy blast of winter; the Border Agency teetering on the edge of meltdown; and – of course – a summer hosepipe ban is introduced across seven water regions.
We only need read how the soaring cost of cocoa means our chocolate eggs will be more expensive, and you know it's Easter. (In fact, I must speak with the foreign desk and ask them just why that story hasn't been filed).
However, if you refuse to heed the doom merchants you throw yourselves at the mercy of the UK Border Agency and Spanish air traffic control alike. Hmm.
Try one of Visit Britain's much vaunted "staycations" instead, and you may well find yourselves like the unfortunate family in the caravan depicted on today's front cover. Looks fun, you say? Maybe for a day, but imagine it for two weeks. Personally, I would rather read another Mail online article by Samantha Brick about how truly blighted her life is by her unique beauty than spend a day on a caravan holiday.
It must be said, I am writing the above with apprehension. For reasons not unconnected with a lack of funds, I am staycationing next week. The tentative plan is for us to all "do" art galleries, get fit, cook up a storm, watch mighty Fulham beat Chelsea, and visit the relatives – just the type of holiday that doubtless will have me on lastminute.com by Monday, in a frantic search for sunshine and a respite for my leaking wallet.
Between now and then, though, there is Easter weekend, one of my favourites of the year. More about that tomorrow.Follow @stefanohat Reuse content