Today's letter from the Editor
Today's Matrices
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Maths Teacher

£110 - £200 per day: Randstad Education Leeds: Secondary Maths Teacher for spe...

Business Analyst - Surrey - Permanent - Up to £50k DOE

£40000 - £50000 Per Annum Excellent benefits: Clearwater People Solutions Ltd:...

***ASP.NET Developer - Cheshire - £35k - Permanent***

£30000 - £35000 Per Annum Excellent benefits: Clearwater People Solutions Ltd:...

***Solutions Architect*** - Brighton - £40k - Permanent

£35000 - £40000 Per Annum Excellent benefits: Clearwater People Solutions Ltd:...

i Editor's Letter: the male mid-life crisis is as inevitable as death and taxes

 

My irrepressible cousin Pompeo emails from Boston (Massachusetts, not Lincolnshire). In his early 50s, a year after his heart attack, he has reacted in the time-honoured tradition of a male mid-life crisis, and bought a 1500cc Kawasaki. Unsurprisingly, his long-suffering wife Debbie did not speak to him for a couple of days. Unfortunately, Pomp may have regarded this as more blessing than curse. He is an Italian-American of the old school.

It could have been worse: he could have run off with a woman half his age, a prospect Debbie would snort at derisively (it's the “run” bit). He could have bought a muscle car. He could even have picked up an electric guitar and started learning old Boston (the hairy group) riffs from his eight-track cartridge collection. “More than a Feeling”? Anyone?

Male mid-life crises take many forms, but are as inevitable as death and taxes. Apparently – so I'm told – the physical powers wane; gammy knees kick in; stairs puff you out; you dance … like a dad at the disco; you can't do the lotus position, let alone the camel; you are no longer the love god you thought you were; not even the Lynx effect works; and everyone, just everyone, tells you to not be embarrassing – don't hum, sing, whistle or talk to your children's schoolfriends. Those children that once worshipped you? Now, you're just a taxi service. You are the real squeezed middle: more financial responsibilities than the young, less spending power than the old. Then there's your own personal squeezed middle, the waistband. You may even have to accept that you will never play for your country at anything: OK, maybe bowls. Or darts.

Sounds grim, but there are causes for optimism: exhibit A: Ryan Giggs, on the occasion of his 1,00th professional match and another year's contract extension. But then, he got his mid-life crisis in early. Exhibit B: George Clooney, who has made salt 'n' pepper hair “gorgeous”, Exhibit C: Well, the hair hasn't started growing out of the nostrils or ears yet. Now, that's something to look forward to in our golden years. Until Monday.

Career Services

Day In a Page

Wilko Johnson, now the bad news: musician splits with manager after police investigate assault claims

Wilko Johnson, now the bad news

Former Dr Feelgood splits with manager after police investigate assault claims
Mark Udall: The Democrat Senator with a fight on his hands ahead of the US midterm elections

Mark Udall: The Democrat Senator with a fight on his hands

The Senator for Colorado is for gay rights, for abortion rights – and in the Republicans’ sights as they threaten to take control of the Senate next month
New discoveries show more contact between far-flung prehistoric humans than had been thought

New discoveries show more contact between far-flung prehistoric humans than had been thought

Evidence found of contact between Easter Islanders and South America
Cerys Matthews reveals how her uncle taped 150 interviews for a biography of Dylan Thomas

Cerys Matthews on Dylan Thomas

The singer reveals how her uncle taped 150 interviews for a biography of the famous Welsh poet
DIY is not fun and we've finally realised this as a nation

Homebase closures: 'DIY is not fun'

Homebase has announced the closure of one in four of its stores. Nick Harding, who never did know his awl from his elbow, is glad to see the back of DIY
The Battle of the Five Armies: Air New Zealand releases new Hobbit-inspired in-flight video

Air New Zealand's wizard in-flight video

The airline has released a new Hobbit-inspired clip dubbed "The most epic safety video ever made"
Pumpkin spice is the flavour of the month - but can you stomach the sweetness?

Pumpkin spice is the flavour of the month

The combination of cinnamon, clove, nutmeg (and no actual pumpkin), now flavours everything from lattes to cream cheese in the US
11 best sonic skincare brushes

11 best sonic skincare brushes

Forget the flannel - take skincare to the next level by using your favourite cleanser with a sonic facial brush
Paul Scholes column: I'm not worried about Manchester United's defence - Chelsea test can be the making of Phil Jones and Marcos Rojo

Paul Scholes column

I'm not worried about Manchester United's defence - Chelsea test can be the making of Jones and Rojo
Frank Warren: Boxing has its problems but in all my time I've never seen a crooked fight

Frank Warren: Boxing has its problems but in all my time I've never seen a crooked fight

While other sports are stalked by corruption, we are an easy target for the critics
Jamie Roberts exclusive interview: 'I'm a man of my word – I'll stay in Paris'

Jamie Roberts: 'I'm a man of my word – I'll stay in Paris'

Wales centre says he’s not coming home but is looking to establish himself at Racing Métro
How could three tourists have been battered within an inch of their lives by a burglar in a plush London hotel?

A crime that reveals London's dark heart

How could three tourists have been battered within an inch of their lives by a burglar in a plush London hotel?
Meet 'Porridge' and 'Vampire': Chinese state TV is offering advice for citizens picking a Western moniker

Lost in translation: Western monikers

Chinese state TV is offering advice for citizens picking a Western moniker. Simon Usborne, who met a 'Porridge' and a 'Vampire' while in China, can see the problem
Handy hacks that make life easier: New book reveals how to rid your inbox of spam, protect your passwords and amplify your iPhone

Handy hacks that make life easier

New book reveals how to rid your email inbox of spam, protect your passwords and amplify your iPhone with a loo-roll
KidZania lets children try their hands at being a firefighter, doctor or factory worker for the day

KidZania: It's a small world

The new 'educational entertainment experience' in London's Shepherd's Bush will allow children to try out the jobs that are usually undertaken by adults, including firefighter, doctor or factory worker