Now then, there are two schools of thought on this one. Either you go see James Cameron's "What do you get if you cross two studios with an iceberg?" blockbuster because you need to see it in order to be able to vote wisely at this season's Oscar parties, or you steer clear. (Something the captain signally failed to do, but hey, it was dark.) Like turning down a sought-after but faintly tacky invitation - a trawl through Keanu Reeves's underwear drawer, for example - avoiding this major motion picture event may become the ultimate politico/fashion statement when you consider its gargantuan worldwide box-office take. Face it, if it's water you want, what's wrong with Esther Williams in Dangerous When Wet? And what's it got over The Poseidon Adventure? At least there we didn't know the ending, it was a hell of a lot shorter, funnier and it starred Shelley Winters. What more could you possibly want?
Titanic, on general release