Remember those terrible merengue classes in Dirty Dancing? The ones with the lame be-toupeed students, but the really dishy coach? At Salsa Rico (at the Rheingold Club, 0171-629 5343) you'll find the same kind of thing. Clutzes on the floor, a babe taking the class and a screwball frisson in the air. (Who else but nutballs want to salsa on a Monday?) Classes start at 7pm and cost pounds 5. Go there.
Aspiring poets get down to the Hard Edge Club, a rendezvous for kindred spirits. Share your offerings with the likes of Dee Lite, Nastasya Klimowsky and The Incredible Nigel at The Crown and Sceptre, Great Titchfield St, W1. Info on 0171-923 1083.
Stay in, stay up and catch Lynn Redgrave (above) in her Oscar nominated performance of Georgy Girl (2.40am ITV) who plays the eponymous Georgy a virgin/babe adored by older men in this 60's classic. Charlotte Rampling is also great - as are the Mary Quant classics.
Like deadpan comedy? Mike Gunn is currently the king of black comedy on the circuit. Dressed in an undertakers tails, let him tell you why he likes to carry kittens around with him in the front seat of his car (to twist their heads off, they cure road rage). Catch him at The Bearcat Club, Turks Head, Winchester Rd, Twickenham at 9.15pm (0181-891 1852)