ESSEX GIRLS, get ready to spend - yes, your favourite designer label Moschino has opened a mega five-storey shop at 28-29 Conduit Street, London W1. The store will stock many and varied ranges of clothing including Moschino Couture!, Cheap and Cheap, the jeans ranges, plus accessories and perfume. Now, if Moschino isn't right for you, then fantastico new label Jack probably is. You cannot have missed their ad campaign, featuring gappy-toothed model Georgina Cooper (right), which has run in most magazines over the last couple of months. Yes, Jack is going to hit the UK with a bang! Opening their first store in Windsor at the end of this month, with two London stores opening in mid April and a further nine throughout the UK by the end of the year, they'll have everything from tailoring and knitwear to the essential basic items. I shall say no more on the subject.


So you think it's just us human beings who worry about fashion, well, that's not altogether true. I have it on good authority from my pooch that she is actually concerned about which sweater, collar and lead to wear this season. Well thank the lord for Harrods pet department. It looks like I'm going to have to put my hand in my purse and fork out pounds 19.95 for a new leather collar, probably in pastel pink, a matching pink knitted sweater, pounds 12.95, and some sunglasses, pounds 6.95, that - wait for it - even have UV lenses with fluorescent arms. To add that finishing touch, I know she'll go barking mad for a monogrammed Stetson. Anything to achieve that cowdog look this summer. If that doesn't suit, then don't fret, I'll simply hit the designer dog section, where they have tailor-made pieces for all occasions from pounds 99. Problem is, she won't be able to choose her new pieces, as Harrods will not allow anything of the four legged kind into the store.


I'm sure you're all aware of the label FAKE London. If not, you should be. Famous for their recycled cashmere Union Jack sweaters, worn by the likes of Patsy Kensit and Robbie Williams. Well, you won't be disappointed with their spring/summer designs, which have a truly British feel - the Queen's head, postage stamp stylee, with real pearl necklace; the British bulldog appliqued to the sheerest of tops, complete with lead which fastens around your neck (below) - a must-have his season. Or Black Beauty's silhouette, nibbling at your nipple - giddy up. The even better news is that they have just launched a menswear range. FAKE man has 15 styles of tops, including polo shirts and v-neck tanks, appliqued with designs along the same theme as the womenswear, plus a very important lion motif, which I'm sure will be a firm favourite with the football fans amongst us (me, I'm only a fan of the legs, not the teams). Available from Browns, 23 South Molton Street, London W1. Enquiries: 0171 488 3020.


Everyone's a winner baby, that's the truth - well, lets hope so. I'd like to see the The Full Monty sweep the board at the Oscars, but who knows? There's one thing we can can guarantee: the cast and producers will look absolutely spiffing, as they they have been dressed by Mr Paul Smith, no less. Let's hope our other actors decide to support British fashion too.


I hate to be catty, but sometimes I just can't help it. The other night, I was watching the Nine O'Clock News with Moira Stewart (one likes to keep abreast of the latest goings on) and I couldn't make out whether the lovely Moira was wearing a crash helmet or not. Her hair looked like it had been stuck on with glue, and teased into a point on top. I understand that her job is to deliver the news and we shouldn't be concerned about her appearance, it's just that, with such a comical style, I simply can't concentrate.