Gemma Hayward: I just don't understand why you would use a Kirby grip as decoration. THEY'RE FOR PINNING. Still, I love her sultry shaded make-up.
Hugh Montgomery: Where you see cheap hair clip, I see "judiciously placed girl-next-door brand symbolism, but better than a scrunchie".
Gemma: You'd think that wearing a lace curtain with floral cross-stitch wouldn't work, but in Dolce & Gabbana's hands, Emma is transformed.
Hugh: Sorry, Ms Stone, but fine actress though you are, you're never going to convince as my nan's bedspread. The quality of mustiness is not strained, as they say.
Gemma: Playing it safe with putty-coloured Louboutins – but maybe it's that Spider-Man-red sole she's most attracted to, eh, Mr Garfield?
Hugh: The most predictable deployment of nude this side of a 1990s Ewan McGregor film.
Gemma: Keeping bling to a minimum with stud earrings and a few sparkling rings – she's no Nancy Dell'Olio, this one.
Hugh: Those butterfly rings are the kind of abjectly pretty trinkets that speak of a group birthday present rush-bought by harried friends and designed to elicit bland coos.