The top ten: Stupid car names
John Rentoul is chief political commentator for The Independent on Sunday, and visiting professor at King's College, London, and at Queen Mary University of London. Previously he was chief leader writer for The Independent. He has written a biography of Tony Blair, whom he admired more at the end of his time in office than he did at the beginning.
Sunday 25 August 2013
It was the Nissan Qashqai that did it. The dignity of the Triumph Herald and Austin Ambassador of my childhood finally vanquished by made-up names. As one correspondent, Joe Crowley, said, "When I see Qashqai in my head, it always sounds as 'cash cow' in a Northern Irish accent." Here are 10 more absurd car names.
1. Renault Twingo Nominated by Patrick Hennessy, who also suggested Austin Mini Mayfair and Ford Escort because they were "named after 1970s porn magazines".
2. Mitsubishi Colt Starion With one "r", Stefan Stern reminds us.
3. Kia cee'd Not just random textspeak. Put forward by Leise Cooper, PootBlog and David Nothard.
4. Mazda Bongo Friendee Quite magnificent in its multiple strangeness. Thanks, David Crosbie.
5. Nissan Cedric Popular as taxis in Tokyo, apparently. Nick Reid and others.
6. Dacia Duster Nominated by Steve Evans.
7. Mitsubishi Carisma Thanks to Ian Eveleigh. Car. Isma. Clever? No. A bit like Skoda Superb with added wordplay.
8. Hyundai Getz A nomination from Tom Clancy. In America, Hyundai rhymes with Sunday.
9. Ford Ka Drily witty once. A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.
10. VW up! Volkswagen tries to make everyone write it in lower case with an exclamation mark. It often fails. Also from Tom Clancy.
Next week: Headlines in the form of questions to which the answer is no
Coming soon: Douglas Adams quotations. Send your suggestions (by 3 September), and ideas for future Top 10s, to email@example.com
Life & Style blogs
iPhone 6s Plus photos: leaks show Force Touch display, subtly altered size
iPhone 6s and 6s Plus battery capacity will be weaker than predecessors, Apple leaks suggest
Pansexual: What is it - and when did the term gain popularity?
Amazon Prime Video launches offline viewing, feature Netflix has said is 'never going to happen'
How to discover who your best friends are on WhatsApp - using a tool within the application
Climate change: 2015 will be the hottest year on record 'by a mile', experts say
Jeremy Corbyn calls Osama bin Laden's killing a 'tragedy' - but was it taken out of context?
If these extraordinarily powerful images of a dead Syrian child washed up on a beach don’t change Europe’s attitude to refugees, what will?
If you're not already angry about the refugee crisis, here's a history lesson to remind you why you really should be
Tony Blair attacks Jeremy Corbyn's 'Alice In Wonderland' politics
Theresa May says migrants should be banned from entering the UK unless they have jobs lined up
- 1 Three-year-old ultra-Orthodox Jewish children told 'the non-Jews' are 'evil' in worksheet produced by London school
- 2 Moscow voted the world's unfriendliest city
- 3 The excuses your boss is most likely to believe when you call in sick
- 4 I'm pansexual – here are the five biggest misconceptions about my sexuality
- 5 More than 11,000 Icelanders offer to house Syrian refugees to help European crisis
£40000 - £42000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: This is an exciting opportunity...
£35000 - £40000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: This IT support company has a n...
Negotiable: Recruitment Genius: A works engineer is required in a progressive ...
£21000 - £25000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Our client is seeking someone w...