Need to know: The damage - How much does it cost to invent a new you for the new year? asks Quentin Fottrell
Saturday 23 January 1999
Rolling back the years "Combi-Keyhole Lift", involving full keyhole-surgery facelift - removal of eye bags and laser resurfacing to the skin, pounds 6,000 (a full facelift could cost pounds 12,000); nose job, pounds 2,700; liposuction, around pounds 2,500; penis (or breast) enlargement, pounds 3,500; hormone replacement therapy, up to pounds 390 per year depending on the pharmaceutical brand (or private prescription for Viagra, about pounds 15 per tablet, assuming one a fortnight for a year); laser surgery to improve eyesight, pounds 450 per eye, pounds 900
Wardrobe Designer wool suits, one for each day of the working week, around pounds 450 each, pounds 2,250; long winter coat to wear over the remainder of your frayed 1998 ensembles, pounds 1,000
Grooming Waxing - take your pick from upper lip, legs, or chest and back, up to pounds 18; hydrating facial (anti-oxidant treatment to reduce damage caused by sun, pollution and cigarettes), pounds 40; six acid exfoliation sessions, pounds 150; body wrap to stimulate circulation, pounds 35; aromatherapy massage, pounds 35; reflexology, pounds 17
Time out Weekend retreat in a monastery, pounds 200; two-week holistic holiday in the Mediterranean to truly relax, tan and develop creative skills (writing, acting, Gestalt therapy to uncork any internalised aggression), up to pounds 795; therapy, pounds 50 per session for a year (if you can convince your doctor, you could swing this on the NHS), pounds 2,600; half-a-dozen visits to your local place of worship, pounds 2 per visit for the collection plate, pounds 12; yoga, pounds 270 per year
Total pounds 23,112
Life & Style blogs
Planes go hybrid-electric in important step to greener flight
Victoria Beckham's clothing sales double to £30 million in one year
'Tis the season!: Google celebrates Christmas Eve with second animated Doodle
Christmas 2014: Jesus was not born in a stable, says theologian
UK's first plus-size fashion magazine Slink hits the shelves: 'Style doesn't stop at size 8'
Nigel Farage defends Kerry Smith 'ch***y' comment: 'If you are going for a Chinese, what do you say you’re going for?'
British actor Idris Elba cannot star as James Bond because he is black, says shock jock Rush Limbaugh
Rozanne Duncan: Ukip expels councillor for 'jaw-dropping' comments made in BBC TV interview
Germany anti-Islam protests: 17,000 march on Dresden against 'Islamification of the West'
Ukip member gets into Christmas spirit with Union Flag plea to Santa 'for our country back'
Panic Saturday: 13 million Britons spend £1.2bn – while 13 million others across the country live in poverty unable to afford food
- 1 Planes go hybrid-electric in important step to greener flight
- 2 Christmas comes early to Hong Kong, as millions of bank notes spill out onto busy street
£20000 - £35000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: This full service social media ...
£24000 - £35000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: We are 'Changemakers in retail'...
Very Competitive: Austen Lloyd: Senior Conveyancer - South West We are see...
Excellent Salary: Austen Lloyd: DORSET MARKET TOWN - SENIOR PROPERTY SOLICITOR...