Need to know: The damage - How much does it cost to invent a new you for the new year? asks Quentin Fottrell - Life and Style - The Independent

Need to know: The damage - How much does it cost to invent a new you for the new year? asks Quentin Fottrell

Any unfulfilled ambitions, deep-rooted loneliness or general dissatisfaction usually come to the surface around this time of year. For those who want to make a fresh start, there are at least three major options: revamp your image, nurture your creative/emotional side, or completely reinvent yourself. Unlike with the celebs - Geri Halliwell (formerly known as Ginger Spice), Liz Hurley (formerly Hugh Grant's girlfriend) - most of the world won't know what the old you was like and won't be able to draw sceptical comparisons, although you may have to edit your friends. Famous or not, this guide - suitable for men and women - should help spark you into action ...

Rolling back the years "Combi-Keyhole Lift", involving full keyhole-surgery facelift - removal of eye bags and laser resurfacing to the skin, pounds 6,000 (a full facelift could cost pounds 12,000); nose job, pounds 2,700; liposuction, around pounds 2,500; penis (or breast) enlargement, pounds 3,500; hormone replacement therapy, up to pounds 390 per year depending on the pharmaceutical brand (or private prescription for Viagra, about pounds 15 per tablet, assuming one a fortnight for a year); laser surgery to improve eyesight, pounds 450 per eye, pounds 900

Wardrobe Designer wool suits, one for each day of the working week, around pounds 450 each, pounds 2,250; long winter coat to wear over the remainder of your frayed 1998 ensembles, pounds 1,000

Grooming Waxing - take your pick from upper lip, legs, or chest and back, up to pounds 18; hydrating facial (anti-oxidant treatment to reduce damage caused by sun, pollution and cigarettes), pounds 40; six acid exfoliation sessions, pounds 150; body wrap to stimulate circulation, pounds 35; aromatherapy massage, pounds 35; reflexology, pounds 17

Time out Weekend retreat in a monastery, pounds 200; two-week holistic holiday in the Mediterranean to truly relax, tan and develop creative skills (writing, acting, Gestalt therapy to uncork any internalised aggression), up to pounds 795; therapy, pounds 50 per session for a year (if you can convince your doctor, you could swing this on the NHS), pounds 2,600; half-a-dozen visits to your local place of worship, pounds 2 per visit for the collection plate, pounds 12; yoga, pounds 270 per year

Total pounds 23,112

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