What's hot, what's cold, what's good, what's bad - Fashion Fandango brings you the latest from the glamorous (I think not) world of fashion
FCUK. You can't miss the new ad campaign by French Connection - Fashion is a four-letter word, (it stands for French Connection UK, risky huh?). Forget showing clothes, they go for blank white paper with the above mentioned play-on-naughty-word and a model, chopped in half, peeping from the side of poster. It's on the biggest traffic-stopping billboards around town and in every magazine, and it certainly makes you look twice. Personally, I would rather see a bit more clobber and a little more of old Charley Speed. Anyway, I'm going to call old Calvin K and tell him that he'd better watch out - FC looks set to take over the world instead.

I've decided I'm going to move up north, Bradford to be exact. Fenella, a helpful reader, sent me a bus ticket from there - they don't have to put up with cKbe on theirs (Fandango, 20 April), they have the pleasant aroma of Radion washing powder. And it's scratch-'n'-sniff, too. Great if you happen to sit next to a smelly person. In stink to you too, Fenella.

Help, I'm a shopaholic! Dragged to Covent Garden by my best buddy last week on a serious shopping trip. Began to hyperventilate at the thought of owning an American-tan leather bag by Karen Millen at pounds 89 - I had to buy it, of course, as my friend was not prepared to take me to hospital so early into our trip. Then, my feet get desperate for an airing and, my, how embarrassing it is exposing the feet that haven't seen the light of day since September. I pity the sales assistants who served me that day. Came across the bounciest, black wedge sandals at Pied a Terre, which fasten with Velcro, great for when your feet swell in the heat, pounds 95, comfy and funky. Apologies for the chipped toe nails.

If you are thinking about getting married, don't do anything until you've checked out the latest edition of Colors magazine, entitled "Marriage" (available at most Benetton stores). A compilation of wedding pics sent in by couples from all over the world, it's a guide on how to a) meet the right person, b) propose, c) how not to look, and d) behave when you take the plunge. Top marks to the American bride for wearing white cowboy boots teamed with her nylon meringue dress. And the Dutch couple for getting married in nothing but a garland of flowers. Ooo er, saucy!

Yet another shop opened on Bond Street this week - Marc Cain, the German design house whose objective is to cater "to the needs of their customer with a collection that transcends international barriers". So, you're fine if you travel often. Emphasis on suits with safari feel, great for Kenya, yah. Striking black and white trousers and accessories, stripy knits, bandeau tops - the perfect summer wardrobe. Marc Cain, 28 New Bond Street, London W1.

Something not to miss in last week's Hello! magazine - the fashion photos of Princess Caroline of Monaco taken by Kaiser Karl Lagerfield. Nice pictures shame about the headline which reads, "Photographed by Karl Lagerfeld just days before shaving her head"! Oh really, thank you so much for telling me that. Hello! earth to Hello!