On Tap (7.30pm BBC1) The BBC's "Water Week" begins with this Watchdog- style magazine. Sue Lawley delivers a lorry-load of half-price Thames Water to South West Water customers, who face the most expensive bills in the country; Peter Snow looks at Britain's weather and water supply and asks why the two don't add up ("the wrong type of rain", apparently) and Jancis Robinson does a taste comparison on bottled and tap water.

Vile Bodies (10.55pm C4) "My weenie should be showing - it's a bit small today, but never mind," says 78-year-old John Coplans, who specialises in photographing himself naked. A new series about how some photographers are challenging taboos about the human body, begins with Coplans, Jacqueline Tellalian, who photographs herself naked and pressed up against glass (imagine more artful variations on those bums-on-the-photocopier larks), and a bloke who snaps the deformed.

The 70th Annual Academy Awards (2am BBC2). Will Titanic win the full monty? If you can't wait for tomorrow night's edited highlights, Barry Norman hosts the wee-hours live coverage of tonight's events in Hollywood.

THe film

The Player (12mdn't BBC2) An Oscar night screening for Robert Altman's funny, cameo-ridden but inoffensive 1992 expose of the movie industry (Tinseltown loved it). It's a huge Altmanesque ensemble piece with Tim Robbins playing the nearest thing to a lead, as the production executive who murders a writer. Less ambitious but more entertaining than Nashville, the funniest moment is Buck Henry pitching an idea for The Graduate 2, with a bed-ridden Mrs Robinson moving in with Benjamin and Elaine.

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