what do women really want from their cars?

ANDREA, bus driver: I tell you, if I got a chance, my car would be so bloody small that no one but me could fit into it, right, 'cos I'm sick of bloody people everywhere when I'm driving this bus. My ideal car would go really fast and I could burn everyone up on the motorway and at the lights. Yeah, it'd be great to let my hair down and really drive fast. I have to be sensible and everything driving this.

DRUSILLA BEYFUS, author of Modern Manners: More storage! Women have to do a hell of a lot of lugging - babies, shopping, luggage. Doors are a nuisance - they stick when you try to cram in the chair you've just bought from the antique shop, for instance. They need to be more flexible and give more space. And I'd like a car everyone envied - they can be such beautiful objects.

JENNY ECLAIR, comedienne: I want a great big tank that says "Eat rust motherf---er! Blonde on Board". I despise cars designed by men for women, those nippy little womanly cars that are meant to drop you off outside the butcher's. If I had no money what I'd like is a transit van with its own drummer choking on his own vomit in the back and a mattress covered with discarded hymens. But I'm too old for that. If I had loads of money I'd want an old Rolls - in black or maybe bright pink. And I'd have a cadaverous but cute chauffeur in livery. And tinted windows I could wind down to give people a peek of me. And an armoury of weapons in case someone cut me up at a roundabout. A big boxing glove would be nice. You could press a button and Wham!

JILLY COOPER, novelist: I'm in love with my own car, it's a Polo, I've had it 18 months. It's definitely on my side, it rights wrongs for me if I put myself into first gear instead of third.

ANNA, works for the AA: I just want locks everywhere, something really safe in case I break down. Ideally it would make heads turn, too, and it would start in the mornings. But the safety thing's most important.

SARAH ENTWISTLE, student: I've just passed my test and I want a car I can afford! I'd be happy enough owning a car to be bothered about what it looked like. I wouldn't want to get a Beetle and paint it with orange spots or anything, but I like the look of a clapped-out car. Something second-hand which looks like people have done exciting things in it, been places.

NATALIE ROSCOE, legal secretary: I've just started driving lessons - I'm sick of scumming around on Tubes at night. I want to be able to zoom around in some fab convertible with the top down and a chiffon scarf on when it's summer time. I hate being the only person I know who can't drive - but it does mean I can always get pissed when I go out with friends, I suppose. I want my car to look good, but if I'm being sensible for a minute, I know I'm supposed to care about whether the seat belts click in an emergency and all that. I'd never trust a second hand one.

EMMA BAGNALL, freelance designer: A bloody big engine, that'd do nicely.