long-term commitment to get through all the niggly bits of day- to-day life, such as who does the washing-up. I get criticised for not buying enough flowers and presents, so maybe you should put that in too. My wife buys me little things. I suppose it's to show you're thinking about each other despite the daily grind.

Sarah Hickey, 24, advertising executive, single: Two people always talking about things on their minds. I agree with my Nana about going into marriage and being grown-up enough to realise it won't always be brilliant; you have to stick at it. I love the idea of being married, though.

Peter Harman, 52, retired, married 26 years: You've got to be in love, that's vitally important. and you must respect each other, and encourage each other to lead independent lives.

David Fox, 38, paramedic, divorced: I don't believe in marriage, which made my getting married rather silly. The most important element in a marriage is the same taste in music, but my wife and I had the same taste and it still didn't work.

Robert Smith, 37, housing officer, married five years: Not having chil- dren. It's the effect children have on women that causes problems.

Julie Allen, 37, psychologist, married seven years: Having the same needs as each other and wanting the same things.

James Wilder, 27, actor, single: The secret of a good marriage is knowing you could be married to someone else, but you aren't.