Yesterday was a ...
Good Day for lovers, as the Dutch post office announced the introduction of heart-shaped panels on their Valentine's Day stamps, which can be scratched off to reveal messages of love and a scent of roses.
Bad Day for fussy lovers, as the Dutch Post Office said that purchasers may choose their slogan only if they buy 10 stamps.
Expensive Day for paying lovers, as prostitutes in Zimbabwe raised their charges by 67 per cent. They also appealed to housewives to give their husbands more money to spend on their services. "We are not married, but we also need to survive and send our children to school," a spokeswoman said.
Restful Day for gnome-lovers, as the "Garden Gnomes Liberation Front", who have snatched more than 30 gnomes from gardens in France and set them free in nearby woodland, announced cessation of such activities until spring because most gnomes have gone indoors for the winter. Members of the group operate in bands of seven out of respect for Snow White.
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