Business Diary: Judgement Day for Amazon

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The Independent Online

Thursday marked Judgement Day.

The day, according to the Terminator franchise, that military computer Skynet would become self-aware and turn the machines against mankind. While killer robots do not, as yet, appear to be travelling back in time, 21 April was marked by a few computer glitches, including problems at Amazon's web hosting service. On the company's web forum someone asked if it was Skynet's fault. In an outbreak of humour one representative apologised for the issues, before adding: "Skynet did not have anything to do with the service event at this time."

Voda gets into wedding spirit

The village of Bucklebury's local council is preparing for an invasion next Friday. Why the interest? Well it is home to the parents of a certain Kate Middleton, and 20,000 well-wishers are expected to descend upon the village on the day of the royal wedding. So, friendly neighbour Vodafone has decided to lend a hand. The mobile giant's headquarters are situated just down the road in Newbury, and it will lug over some portable base stations to stop the mobile infrastructure collapsing. Better than help with the bunting.

'Godfather' helmer tips for Dimon

On Wednesday night JP Morgan boss Jamie Dimon was spotted by Wall Street tabloid Dealbreaker strapping on a nosebag with none other than legendary Godfather director Francis Ford Coppola and his daughter Sophia, who has followed her old man into the trade. Sadly, little is known of what passed between them at the sit-down in trendy eatery 21, but any underperforming employees may be wondering fearfully whether they are about to find participants from the JP Morgan-sponsored Jessamine horse race in their beds.

Bank celebrates 'thrilling' victory

A remarkably effusive email has dropped into Diary's inbox, hailing an award win in such glowing terms it has to be shared. The company said it was celebrating "awards glory" after securing "one of the industry's most coveted European awards". So was it the Nobel Prize? A Bafta? Er, no, the "major" award was the "Best Example of Service Excellence" at the Visa Europe Member Awards. Still, Bank of America's Europe Card Services were "thrilled". Bless.