Business Diary: O'Leary hoodwinks the EC

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The Independent Online

We wouldn't want to suggest no one at the European Commission does any work, but we are a little suspicious about the biography of Ryanair's Michael O'Leary, posted on its website ahead of his appearance at a conference. Is it the introduction – "Born in a stable in 1961, he was a boy genius, who excelled both academically and at sports" – that makes us think the EC has simply cut and paste O'Leary's submission to them, or the conclusion, "It is widely known that women find him irresistible"?

Metallica fears for the euro

There aren't many reasons to give thanks for the eurozone crisis, but here's one (well, for some of you, anyway). So concerned is the American management of Metallica about the prospect of the single currency collapsing, it is bringing forward the date of the band's European tour. Metallica's business advisers reckon if they come next year, rather than in 2013, as they had originally planned, they've got more chance of actually being paid.

Chance to work with greatness

Looking for a new role on Wall Street? Ok, the job, just posted on LinkedIn isn't actually on Wall Street, but in Omaha, Nebraska. And it's an executive assistant post rather than on the frontline of investment. Still, working as Warren Buffett's sidekick is bound to be rewarding, even if the sage of Omaha did once complain that he paid less tax than his secretary.

I hear whatyou say

Advance warning: tomorrow is Plain English Day and this year the campaign is targeting ridiculous business-speak. It's even conducted a poll of the terms people find most annoying in the workplace, so you can try to avoid them. Top of the list comes "touch base", closely followed by "I'll socialise that" and "think outside the box". Consider yourselves warned.