Credit crisis diary: Jamie picks the wrong time to expand
Thursday 20 November 2008
The Diary bows to no one in its admiration for the "naked chef", right, but is it possible that Jamie Oliver's sense of timing has gone awry? Fresh from a gruelling stint persuading the people of Rotherham to eat more healthily, Oliver's next venture will be in a slightly more glamorous location. He plans a trendy new eatery in Canary Wharf. Shame the once-bustling malls beneath Docklands' finest investment banks are now beginning to resemble the south Yorkshire industrial wastelands with which our favourite chef is now all too familiar.
What goes around comes around
As the Chancellor ponders how to help struggling small businesses, he ought to remember that he owes them a favour. Just prior to speaking at an event to mark Global Entrepreneurship Week yesterday, Alistair Darling gave an interview to a BBC reporter. The first couple of questions were batted away with ease, but Mr Darling then looked stumped by a tougher third inquiry. Luckily, the large audience of entrepreneurs chose that moment to start their "speed-networking session", with a loud blast on a whistle. The uproar defeated the Beeb's sound equipment and the interview was abandoned.
Always look on the bright side of life
This week's award for wishful thinking goes to WhiteConcierge, the self-styled "lifestyle management service". It has published research showing that far from suffering in the downturn, the average wealthy person it targets is almost £140,000 better off today than five years ago. Keep telling yourselves it will be all right chaps.
A new line of work for your old foe?
Today's credit crunch gag: Talked to my bank manager the other day and he said he was going to concentrate on the big issues from now on... He sold me one outside KFC yesterday.
With friends like Alistair...
More help for the Chancellor comes in the form of the submissions he receives ahead of each pre-Budget report. One such plea should cause him to wince. The empty buildings tax he introduced in April to raise money and improve derelict city centres is apparently hitting one constituency particularly hard. It turns out local authorities have more empty buildings than anyone else, with Birmingham City Council alone facing a new rates bill that is £800,000 higher. Oops.
- 1 Drugs Live cannabis trial: Hash is less harmful than any other drug, expert claims
- 2 Have sex with your iPad thanks to the new sex toy no-one asked for
- 3 The 'sex selfie stick' lets you FaceTime the inside of a vagina
- 5 Why you're almost certainly more like your father than your mother
Out-of-touch MPs ‘don’t get it’, says ex-Civil Service chief
Mark Zuckerberg: Facebook CEO's one simple test for who to hire
Bali nine: Welcome to 'Execution Island' – the Indonesian holiday resort where foreigners are sent to die
'A girl is more responsible for rape than a boy': The statement that shocked the world... except India
The 'sex selfie stick' lets you FaceTime the inside of a vagina
Durham Free School: 'Creationism taught at' free school facing closure
Nearly 100,000 of Britain's poorest children go hungry after parents' benefits are cut
Ukip would cut billions from Scottish budget to fund English tax cuts
End of the licence fee: BBC to back radical overhaul of how it is funded
Ukraine crisis: Top Chinese diplomat backs Putin and says West should 'abandon zero-sum mentality'
Boris Nemtsov shot dead: Outspoken Putin critic who had expressed fears for his life is killed near the Kremlin
iJobs Money & Business
£8 per hour: Recruitment Genius: This Pension Specialist was established early...
£30 - 35k + Bonus & Benefits: Guru Careers: We are seeking an Executive Assist...
£25000 - £30000 per annum + benefits: Ashdown Group: A global leader operating...
Voluntary post, reasonable expenses reimbursed: Reach Volunteering: Would you ...