Credit crisis diary: There'll be a writ in the post any day now

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More bad news for British taxpayers. The rest of the world is about to sue us for the not inconsiderable sum of $35trn. Steven Grasse, a member of something called the International Coalition for British Reparations, claims the credit crisis is all our fault. His argument seems to be that since Adam Smith invented capitalism and he was British, we're to blame. Oh, and apparently Margaret Thatcher's City reforms in the Eighties caused a financial deregulation arms race. "Once again, British hubris, greed and complete indifference towards other nations, races and cultures has landed the world with a catastrophic predicament," Grasse concludes. Someone sell that man a sub-prime mortgage.

Barnsley isn't boring

Mervyn King's recession-calling speech on Tuesday night, in Leeds, featured a lengthy paean to the "Yorkshire virtues of patience and sound defence". The Governor's pay-off line was: "The long march back to boredom and stability starts tonight in Leeds." Shame someone forgot to tell the Yorkshiremen down the road in Barnsley. Before Mr King had even made it back to London, the town's local building society was admitting to being the latest victim of the crisis.

Confidence crumbles?

Comfort food and a bit of mend-and-make-do will get us through the bad times. Google says internet searches for crumble recipes are up 40 per cent on a year ago. Sewing classes are even more popular, registering a 60 per cent increase in interest on the search engine.

Don't get the wrong impression

Seeking some wisdom on the credit crunch? A seminar covering the UK's response to the crisis could be just the thing, though it features a curious guest. Brokerage BCG, the event's host, presents speakers including former chancellor Ken Clarke and Thomas Huertas, head of banking at the FSA. They ought to know what they're talking about. But how has impressionist Rory Bremner managed to crash the gig? Presumably he'll be trialling his latest alter egos – expect BBC business editor Robert Peston to make an appearance.

Dumber and dumber

Poor old KfW. Dubbed Germany's dumbest bank by the local press after it transferred £250m to Lehman Brothers just hours before the US investment bank collapsed, it is now being investigated by the police. The funds were transferred mistakenly, the bank claims, but prosecutors have been called in. Mental health officials might have been a better bet.

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