Football: Sidelines - Ten things that Aston Villa's Tobagan Dwight Yorke might be missing today
1 Lazy days in Scarborough. Unlike its English namesake, Tobago's capital is warm and friendly.
2 Bizarre Christmas news stories. The Trinidad Express this week told of a street vendor whose patter consists solely of: "Call me Rodney. I is the man who selling curtain rod."
3 Mayhem of a high order. Opposition leader Patrick Manning said this week that fiscal policies were "total quality chaos". Like Villa performances then, but with quality.
4 Jug-jug. Cornflour, peas and salted meat.
5 Calypso, steel pan, ska and reggae.
6 Obeah - black magic.
7 The chaconia flower, symbol of imperishability. (Not something Yorke's fitness has experienced very much of late.)
8 The islands' new maximum security prison, which seeks to keep people of a mad and dangerous nature secure. As opposed to Villa Park, which encourages them to come out in public.
9 Hurricane shelters made of thin wood. As useful as Stan Collymore.
10 Pleasant accents.
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