Twitter: No end of the Piers pain in sight

Despite juggling careers on both sides of the Atlantic, it takes more than mere time zones to hinder Piers Morgan's relentless presence on Twitter at any given hour.

Seamlessly dividing his energies between insulting that "clod" Lord Sugar and promoting CNN's American-election coverage and lambasting England's cricket selectors, Piers is a tweeting multitasker. Incensed by footballer Robin van Persie's transfer from Arsenal to Manchester United – (Piers likes us to know he is a fierce supporter of the former) – the prospect of the two clubs meeting on Saturday left him poised for fireworks.

The fact "Robin Van Pursestrings" had the nerve to score against his old club in under three minutes prompted the inevitable Piers-shaped Twitter eruption. Having emotionally demanded manager Arsène Wenger's sacking throughout the match, which Arsenal lost 2-1, a glum Piers tweeted: "My week in full: Mon – hit by Hurricane Sandy in NYC. Thurs – bitten by dog. Sat – see Van Pursestrings score against us. Anyone had worse?"

On Planet Piers, he likes us all to feel his pain.