10 most irritating television characters

Run for the hills – Mr Blobby is making a comeback. But is he really the worst of a very bad bunch?


Mr Blobby

Was there something in the water? Did the nation really once fall about laughing at the clumsy antics of a bloke in a big pink rubber costume with yellow blobs all over it?

Yes. Bizarrely, Noel Edmonds's daft sidekick was so popular his single bumped Take That off the top of the charts in 1993. (And has since been voted the most annoying Christmas number one ever.)

Superstardom didn't last long: the Blobster was severely embarrassed when a theme park built in his honour closed down in 1994, after only three months. Comeback attempts included several by-elections.

Talent: Falling over.

Catchphrase: "Blobby." He never used any other words.

Where is he now? About to co-star in 'Noel's House Party' again, if reports yesterday are true. The BBC is said to be keen on remaking a show that once had 16 mIllion viewers.

A spokesman for Mr Blobby said: "Blobby."

Pudsey Bear

It's not the tear-jerking film clips in the way of the comedy that are the most irritating thing about 'Children in Need'. It's not the smug performers who could raise millions by emptying their pockets. No, it's the too-cute teddy who's worn that flaming bandage over his eye since 1986.

Talent: None.

Catchprase: None.

Where is he now? On a bender with a weathergirl.

Barney

Makes sleep-deprived parents scream. Since 1992, the friendly purple dinosaur has been relentless in his cheerful singing and dancing, and his marketing hypnotising pre-school girls and boys, while emptying the wallets of mummies and daddies.

Talent: Ripping heads off little children, as a T Rex. But they never show that side of him, do they?

Catchphrase: "I love you."

Where is he now? Everywhere.

Scrappy Doo

It was one of the great cartoons, led by a cowardly Great Dane called Scooby. Then Hanna-Barbera inserted a "cute"" sidekick, a yappy little brat of a nephew. Grrr.

Talent: Getting in the way.

Catchphrase: "Lemme at 'em."

Where is he now? The kennel in the sky. He was put down.

Tinky Winky

Why him? Why not Dipsy, La La or Po, who are also annoying? Because he isn't gay. Some US church leaders were upset he might be, but the BBC bottled out, saying, "Tinky Winky is simply a sweet baby with a magic bag." Shame.

Talent: Upsetting American evangelicals.

Catchphrase: "Eh-oh."

Where is he now? Time for Tubby Bye Bye .... Try G.A.Y.

The Diddy Men

Children of the Sixties will remember short folk in big hats who danced with Ken Dodd. Children of any other age will say, "Mummy, I'm scared."

Talent: Working in the Jam Butty Mines.

Catchphrase: "We come from Knotty Ash."

Where are they now? When the mines closed, the heart was ripped out of the community.

Emu

Yes, it was funny when the bird pulled Michael Parkinson off his chair in 1976. Yes, we could almost believe his protesting "handler" Rod Hull had nothing to do with it. But then he did it on other shows, again and again and again.

Talent: Violence.

Catchphrase: Silence. Where is he now? On CITV with Toby Hull, son of Rod.

Roland Rat

Self-styled rodent superstar who talked in a Rada version of cockney and asked mildly cheeky questions. Saved the ailing TV-am in 1983, then made a big money move to the BBC. Not much since, because he isn't funny. If Roland were half as good as he thinks he is, he'd be Gordon the Gopher.

Talent: Er... eating cheese?

Catchphrase: "Yeeeaaah."

Where is he now? LA sewers.

Orville

"I wish I could fly," sang a bright green duckling in a nappy on the lap of Keith Harris in 1982. Half the nation wished it could buy him an airline ticket. One way. His TV show lasted eight more years, but Orville still performs.

Talent: Simpering. Catchphrase: "I can't."

Where is he now? Just finished another panto.

Noel Edmonds

The others are products of the imagination, but it seems just as unreal that the BBC may bring this small, furry creature back to Saturday teatimes. Was it lame jokes, weak stunts or the hideously chipper host that got 'Noel's House Party' axed in 1999?

Talent: Skilful comebacks. Catchphrase: See below. Where is he now? Asking, "Deal or no deal?"

Start your day with The Independent, sign up for daily news emails
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
ebooks
ebooksAn introduction to the ground rules of British democracy
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs Media

Recruitment Genius: B2B Media Sales Professional - Work From Home

£20000 - £50000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Enjoying rapid growth we contin...

Recruitment Genius: B2B Media Sales Professional - Work From Home

£20000 - £50000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Enjoying rapid growth we contin...

Recruitment Genius: B2B Media Sales Professional - Work From Home

£20000 - £50000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Enjoying rapid growth we contin...

Recruitment Genius: B2B Media Sales Professional - Work From Home

£20000 - £50000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Enjoying rapid growth we contin...

Day In a Page

Greece debt crisis: What happened to democracy when it’s a case of 'Vote Yes or else'?

'The economic collapse has happened. What is at risk now is democracy...'

If it doesn’t work in Europe, how is it supposed to work in India or the Middle East, asks Robert Fisk
The science of swearing: What lies behind the use of four-letter words?

The science of swearing

What lies behind the use of four-letter words?
The Real Stories of Migrant Britain: Clive fled from Zimbabwe - now it won't have him back

The Real Stories of Migrant Britain

Clive fled from Zimbabwe - now it won’t have him back
Africa on the menu: Three foodie friends want to popularise dishes from the continent

Africa on the menu

Three foodie friends want to popularise dishes from the hot new continent
Donna Karan is stepping down after 30 years - so who will fill the DKNY creator's boots?

Who will fill Donna Karan's boots?

The designer is stepping down as Chief Designer of DKNY after 30 years. Alexander Fury looks back at the career of 'America's Chanel'
10 best statement lightbulbs

10 best statement lightbulbs

Dare to bare with some out-of-the-ordinary illumination
Wimbledon 2015: Heather Watson - 'I had Serena's poster on my wall – now I'm playing her'

Heather Watson: 'I had Serena's poster on my wall – now I'm playing her'

Briton pumped up for dream meeting with world No 1
Wimbledon 2015: Nick Bollettieri - It's time for big John Isner to produce the goods to go with his thumping serve

Nick Bollettieri's Wimbledon Files

It's time for big John Isner to produce the goods to go with his thumping serve
Dustin Brown: Who is the tennis player who knocked Rafael Nadal out of Wimbeldon 2015?

Dustin Brown

Who is the German player that knocked Nadal out of Wimbeldon 2015?
Ashes 2015: Damien Martyn - 'England are fired up again, just like in 2005...'

Damien Martyn: 'England are fired up again, just like in 2005...'

Australian veteran of that Ashes series, believes the hosts' may become unstoppable if they win the first Test
Tour de France 2015: Twins Simon and Adam Yates have a mountain to climb during Tour of duty

Twins have a mountain to climb during Tour of duty

Yates brothers will target the steepest sections in bid to win a stage in France
John Palmer: 'Goldfinger' of British crime was murdered, say police

Murder of the Brink’s-MAT mastermind

'Goldfinger' of British crime's life ended in a blaze of bullets, say police
Forget little green men - aliens will look like humans, says Cambridge University evolution expert

Forget little green men

Leading evolutionary biologist says aliens will look like humans
The Real Stories of Migrant Britain: An Algerian scientist adjusts to life working in a kebab shop

The Real Stories of Migrant Britain

An Algerian scientist struggles to adjust to her new life working in a Scottish kebab shop
Bodyworlds museum: Dr Gunther von Hagens has battled legal threats, Parkinson's disease, and the threat of bankruptcy

Dying dream of Doctor Death

Dr Gunther von Hagens has battled legal threats, Parkinson's disease, and the threat of bankruptcy