Disappointing news for those excited by the story in yesterday's Sun which suggested that the Stoke City striker Peter Crouch is to get a Sky chat show called On the Couch with Peter Crouch – it's not true.
But as soon as Sky confirmed the bad news to Trending's Football Chat Show Correspondent, we were already pitching our own ideas for prime-time shows hosted by football figures. Anyone for On the Love Seat with David Pleat? Or how about On the Pew with Danny Pugh (Crouch's former Stoke teammate).
More? One internet wag suggested On the Floor with Bradley Orr – in which the Blackburn defender shoots the breeze with prostrate guests. Or… On a Pouf with Nigel Clough? And, er, On the Davenport with Calum Davenport?
Any Sky chat-show commissioners out there, feel free to call us…