Web sites

Crufts '97

www.crufts.org.uk

A wistful-looking hound of impeccable pedigree oversees this site for the dog show, starting this week at the Birmingham NEC. Details here of the new competition, Heelwork to Music - listed here as "Crufts Meets Come Dancing", and of the Blairite-sounding Good Citizen Dog Scheme, not to mention a sponsored walk for dogs - pooper scooper essential - called Wet Nose Walkies. If all of this seems a little undignified for a canine institution dating back to 1891, there are also full details of the traditional categories and last year's winners, as well as interesting doggie facts scattered here and there: the seemingly effete trim inflicted on poodles, for instance, has practical origins as streamlining for retrieval of game in water.

Think About Drink

http://www.wrecked.co.uk/

Terry from Dover, Liam from Canterbury and other 16-year-old drinkers are here given space to warn their peers of the social embarrassments arising from over-consumption. Though bearing a discreet Health Education Authority logo, the site prefers personal confessions to preaching, but those mailed in so far are rather bland as cautionary tales go - is the threat of passing out on a date, hiccupping through a job interview or even burning the toast really sufficient to keep kids off the alcopop? Still, there is a commendable lack of melodrama, though the heavier stuff about road accidents and liver damage eventually makes an appearance. There is a drinks menu designed to demonstrate recommended alcohol intake, a quiz with unspecified prizes, and a (usually unpatronising) resort to a notional kidspeak: "What's such a laugh about throwing up and speaking to the porcelain telephone all night?"

Body Inflation Fetish Home Page

http://members.aol.com/lvkane/index.html

Gordon Brown's least favourite site, though these pages promote inflation in a pneumatic rather than economic sense. The Net plays host to a range of formerly unimaginable erotic specialisms, but we know this one is a joke, if only because of its (compressed) air of innocence: no nudes, but accounts of "Donna having fun in scuba gear". A Celebrity Inflation section includes an expanded Cindy Crawford, and visitors can mail in shots of other potential victims. Short stories pander to the perverted - "Suddenly, she felt a massive surge of pressure fill her entire body as she began to slowly balloon out" - and there's a database of inflatable- friendly movies, which includes Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory but misses out, for some reason, Blow-Up.

The Sleep Well

http://www-leland.stanford.edu/dement/

It's much harder to fall asleep at a Web site than during a movie, but you can assess your tendency to drift off with the Epworth Sleepiness Test, available here. Actually, there is nothing dozy about these pages, which offer informative background on sleep disorders such as hypersomnia, insomnia and narcolepsy, and a rallying point from which to lobby the Government and medical establishment - sleep activism is a serious project. There are links to pages on dreaming, and details of laser treatments for snoring. The site's author, one "nodmaster", can't help but acknowledge the inherent humour of it all, and defines consciousness as "that annoying time between naps".

Pirates

http://www.nationalgeographic.com/kids

Blackbeard and the Barbarossa Brothers, the tea-drinking Black Bart and the cross-dressing Anne Bonny all shake their booty at this National Geographic children's site. Participants are invited to walk the plank and be educated at the same time, by filling in the blanks in a series of pirate biographies, and studying detailed maps of their (somewhat PG-rated) predations in the Caribbean and elsewhere. Best of a scurvy lot may be Shing Shih, the "brisk brilliant widow" and her fleet of 800 pirate junks, presumably full of bootleg copies of Office 97.

Bill Pannifer

PROMOTED VIDEO
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
News
ebookA unique anthology of reporting and analysis of a crucial period of history
Independent
Travel Shop
the manor
Up to 70% off luxury travel
on city breaks Find out more
santorini
Up to 70% off luxury travel
on chic beach resorts Find out more
sardina foodie
Up to 70% off luxury travel
on country retreats Find out more
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs Media

Account Manager, London

£18000 - £22000 per annum, Benefits: Excellent Uncapped Commission Structure: ...

Sales Executive, London

£18000 - £22000 per annum: Charter Selection: This exciting entertainment comp...

Digital Producer / Digital Project Manager

£28 - 45k: Guru Careers: A Digital Producer / Digital Project Manager is neede...

Account Manager, Spanish, London Bridge

£30,000 + 20K Commssion: Charter Selection: This rapidly expanding organisatio...

Day In a Page

Save the tiger: The animals bred for bones on China’s tiger farms

The animals bred for bones on China’s tiger farms

The big cats kept in captivity to perform for paying audiences and then, when dead, their bodies used to fortify wine
A former custard factory, a Midlands bog and a Leeds cemetery all included in top 50 hidden spots in the UK

A former custard factory, a Midlands bog and a Leeds cemetery

Introducing the top 50 hidden spots in Britain
Ebola epidemic: Plagued by fear

Ebola epidemic: Plagued by fear

How a disease that has claimed fewer than 2,000 victims in its history has earned a place in the darkest corner of the public's imagination
Chris Pratt: From 'Parks and Recreation' to 'Guardians of the Galaxy'

From 'Parks and Recreation' to 'Guardians of the Galaxy'

He was homeless in Hawaii when he got his big break. Now the comic actor Chris Pratt is Hollywood's new favourite action star
How live cinema screenings can boost arts audiences

How live cinema screenings can boost arts audiences

Broadcasting plays and exhibitions to cinemas is a sure-fire box office smash
Shipping container hotels: Pop-up hotels filling a niche

Pop-up hotels filling a niche

Spending the night in a shipping container doesn't sound appealing, but these mobile crash pads are popping up at the summer's biggest events
Native American headdresses are not fashion accessories

Feather dust-up

A Canadian festival has banned Native American headwear. Haven't we been here before?
Boris Johnson's war on diesel

Boris Johnson's war on diesel

11m cars here run on diesel. It's seen as a greener alternative to unleaded petrol. So why is London's mayor on a crusade against the black pump?
5 best waterproof cameras

Splash and flash: 5 best waterproof cameras

Don't let water stop you taking snaps with one of these machines that will take you from the sand to meters deep
Louis van Gaal interview: Manchester United manager discusses tactics and rebuilding after the David Moyes era

Louis van Gaal interview

Manchester United manager discusses tactics and rebuilding after the David Moyes era
Will Gore: The goodwill shown by fans towards Alastair Cook will evaporate rapidly if India win the series

Will Gore: Outside Edge

The goodwill shown by fans towards Alastair Cook will evaporate rapidly if India win the series
The children were playing in the street with toy guns. The air strikes were tragically real

The air strikes were tragically real

The children were playing in the street with toy guns
Boozy, ignorant, intolerant, but very polite – The British, as others see us

Britain as others see us

Boozy, ignorant, intolerant, but very polite
How did our legends really begin?

How did our legends really begin?

Applying the theory of evolution to the world's many mythologies
Watch out: Lambrusco is back on the menu

Lambrusco is back on the menu

Naff Seventies corner-shop staple is this year's Aperol Spritz