News monkey; A simian slant on last week's news
Sunday 10 January 1999
t THE PRINCE AND THE PR. Prince Edward has managed to surprise us all with the announcement of his engagement to Sophie Rhys-Jones. The pair were so successful at keeping their low-profile romance private these past few years that many people forgot there was a Prince Edward. The publicity surrounding Royal marriages can be difficult to cope with, but the Prince's work in television and Miss Rhys-Jones's career in PR should at least prepare them both for the prospect of the press leaving them alone for months on end.
t SPIN OFF. The abrupt departure of Peter Mandelson and Charlie Whelan from the corridors of power leaves Tony Blair and Gordon Brown in the unseemly position of having to carry on their feuds first-hand. But even in the short time the spin doctors have been absent, the rivalry seems to have taken on a wholesome air of friendly competition, especially after it was revealed that Mr Blair made the brilliant move of rescuing a drowning man while on holiday in the Seychelles. We can expect Gordon to open up a donkey sanctuary by way of retaliation.
t ROD SPLITS. Rachel Hunter's decision to give up on Rod Stewart because he's old and boring marks her out as something of a latecomer - most of the rest of us came to a similar decision in 1982. Still, one hates to think of Rod spending his declining years without a blonde 20 years his junior by his side, but it's probably a simple matter of him ringing up the modelling agency he uses and asking them to send round another.
- 1 The difference between a psychopath and a sociopath
- 2 It won’t work, Jeremy: The Health Secretary has lost the confidence of the medical profession in his attempt to reform the NHS
- 3 Kim Jong-un awarded global statesmanship prize by Indonesia
- 4 Dutch King Willem-Alexander declares the end of the welfare state
- 5 Robert Mugabe eats a zoo for 'obscene' 91st birthday party
Nasa discovers yet another rocky exoplanet, and it's only 21 light years away
Labour rallies behind Flint as deputy leader to offset a Corbyn win
Kim Jong-un awarded global statesmanship prize by Indonesia
Dutch King Willem-Alexander declares the end of the welfare state
Calais crisis: Migrants that have made it to the UK reveal how Britain has matched their expectations
Yvette Cooper: Our choice is years of Tory rule under Jeremy Corbyn – or a return to a Labour government
Is Britain really full up? Are migrants taking our jobs? Leading academic answers the most common anti-immigration claims
Calais Migrant Crisis: Deputy Mayor of Calais labels Cameron's use of 'swarm' as 'racist' and 'ignorant'
Labour leadership: New poll shows party is now even 'less electable' than under Ed Miliband
While we fixate on Calais, the Home Office is quietly deporting dozens of migrants on 'ghost flights'
Calais crisis: The seven claims made about the migrants - and the reality
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