News monkey; A simian slant on last week's news
Sunday 10 January 1999
t THE PRINCE AND THE PR. Prince Edward has managed to surprise us all with the announcement of his engagement to Sophie Rhys-Jones. The pair were so successful at keeping their low-profile romance private these past few years that many people forgot there was a Prince Edward. The publicity surrounding Royal marriages can be difficult to cope with, but the Prince's work in television and Miss Rhys-Jones's career in PR should at least prepare them both for the prospect of the press leaving them alone for months on end.
t SPIN OFF. The abrupt departure of Peter Mandelson and Charlie Whelan from the corridors of power leaves Tony Blair and Gordon Brown in the unseemly position of having to carry on their feuds first-hand. But even in the short time the spin doctors have been absent, the rivalry seems to have taken on a wholesome air of friendly competition, especially after it was revealed that Mr Blair made the brilliant move of rescuing a drowning man while on holiday in the Seychelles. We can expect Gordon to open up a donkey sanctuary by way of retaliation.
t ROD SPLITS. Rachel Hunter's decision to give up on Rod Stewart because he's old and boring marks her out as something of a latecomer - most of the rest of us came to a similar decision in 1982. Still, one hates to think of Rod spending his declining years without a blonde 20 years his junior by his side, but it's probably a simple matter of him ringing up the modelling agency he uses and asking them to send round another.
- 1 Games of Thrones actor Lena Headey makes emotional promise to her unborn daughter
- 2 Isis burns woman alive for refusing to engage in 'extreme' sex act, UN says
- 4 Female Muay Thai champion hustles coaches to give them a beating
- 5 Picture of couple posing with beached dolphin 'that later died' causes outrage
Isis burns woman alive for refusing to engage in 'extreme' sex act, UN says
Purity balls: Girls in the US making virginity pledges as fathers vow to 'protect purity'
Puerto Rico, island of lost dreams: People are leaving the debt-hit territory in droves as near neighbour Cuba's star rises
Female Muay Thai champion hustles coaches to give them a beating
16-year-old girl beaten and burned alive by lynch mob in Rio Bravo, Guatemala
As a white man, I'm surprised more women aren't tweeting the hashtag #KillAllWhiteMen
Scotland may have to leave the EU even if it votes to stay in, David Cameron confirms
Report finds that Britain's wages are the most unequal in Europe
The day that Britain resigned as a global power
Almost a third of school pupils believe 'Muslims are taking over our country', study claims
Gay marriage 'Bert and Ernie' cake bakery found guilty of discrimination in Northern Ireland
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