News monkey; A simian slant on last week's news
Sunday 10 January 1999
t THE PRINCE AND THE PR. Prince Edward has managed to surprise us all with the announcement of his engagement to Sophie Rhys-Jones. The pair were so successful at keeping their low-profile romance private these past few years that many people forgot there was a Prince Edward. The publicity surrounding Royal marriages can be difficult to cope with, but the Prince's work in television and Miss Rhys-Jones's career in PR should at least prepare them both for the prospect of the press leaving them alone for months on end.
t SPIN OFF. The abrupt departure of Peter Mandelson and Charlie Whelan from the corridors of power leaves Tony Blair and Gordon Brown in the unseemly position of having to carry on their feuds first-hand. But even in the short time the spin doctors have been absent, the rivalry seems to have taken on a wholesome air of friendly competition, especially after it was revealed that Mr Blair made the brilliant move of rescuing a drowning man while on holiday in the Seychelles. We can expect Gordon to open up a donkey sanctuary by way of retaliation.
t ROD SPLITS. Rachel Hunter's decision to give up on Rod Stewart because he's old and boring marks her out as something of a latecomer - most of the rest of us came to a similar decision in 1982. Still, one hates to think of Rod spending his declining years without a blonde 20 years his junior by his side, but it's probably a simple matter of him ringing up the modelling agency he uses and asking them to send round another.
Wellcome Image Awards: The most striking images from the world of science, including breast cancer cells under chemical attack and a photographer’s own kidney stone
Missing Malaysia Airlines plane: Terrorism explanation 'cannot be ruled out', says CIA
Bob Crow death: 'Admired by his members, feared by employers' - Tributes pour in for RMT union leader and 'working class hero' Bob Crow
Oscar Pistorius murder trial: Athlete repeatedly sick as court hears 'graphic details' of Reeva Steenkamp's post-mortem
How climate change helped Genghis Khan: Scientists believe a sudden period of warmer weather allowed the Mongols to invade with such success
Britain's top vet sparks controversy with call for ban on slashing animals' throats in 'ritual' slaughters for halal and kosher meat products
Poor 'live like animals' says Boris's privately educated sister after going on 'poverty safari'
Exclusive: Impact of immigrants on British workers ‘negligible’
Vince Cable: Teachers 'know absolutely nothing' about the world of work
Ukraine crisis: Russia pledges to 'retaliate against sanctions' as Ukrainian president says Crimea vote will not be recognised
The quiet diplomat: Catherine Ashton - recognised and admired in all the world’s troubled countries, yet ridiculed at home
- 2 Family forced to flee home after discovering 'terrifying' nest of spiders in bananas
- 3 Grace Dent: Who cares if she spells it Barraco Barner? Gemma Worrall is more employable than some bookish arts graduate
- 4 Russell Crowe's Noah banned in three Arab countries before worldwide premiere
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