Davina McCall, on why her late mother dying was 'a relief'
The television presenter recalls her difficult relationship with her mother
Davina McCall has described how it was “almost a relief” when her mother died in 2008, thus ending their difficult relationship.
Her French mother, Florence Koch, left the family and returned to Paris when McCall was three. She lived with her paternal grandparents until she was 13 when she moved in with her father.
"I never doubted for a moment that she loved me," said McCall. "It was almost a relief when she was gone and I could stop asking her to be something that she just couldn’t be. Motherhood is about being selfless, to some degree, and she just needed to be the centre of attention."
Her attempts to rebuild a relationship proved futile and her mother couldn’t bring herself to offer her daughter any affection.
"That’s all I ever wanted from my mum," McCall told The Telegraph. "To be held tight in a protective cuddle. To get out of the bath and be wrapped up in a towel, in her arms. That’s why it takes me so long to put my kids to bed every night; I need to hold them."
The 46-year-old – who has three children – still clearly remembers being let down by her mother when she was a child. She has previously said that she was left in a nightclub by her, aged 12.
"I remember once my elder sister and I were really excited about going on holiday to Spain with my mother and some of her friends, when it occurred to them that because I was only little, I would need a babysitter when they went out at night," said McCall. "So my mother decided I wasn’t coming and I had to stay at home."
The television presenter said in 2012 that she felt "relief" that she could "stop swinging from side to side", when her mother died.
"And I also think, 'Please God, when I die, don’t let it be a relief to anybody,'" she said. "I imagined her in the hospital bed, and I imagined these shoots of light going from my palms, all over, across the world, to South Africa, to the hospital where she was at, and going straight into her heart."
"All I kept saying was, ‘I forgive you. I forgive you. I forgive you.’"
- 1 King Salman: Just five days in, Saudi Arabia's new king has already overseen a beheading
- 2 The BBC has just done more to eradicate ‘terrorism’ than all our wars since 9/11
- 4 Presidential optical illusion offers clues to how brain processes faces
King Salman: Just five days in, Saudi Arabia's new king has already overseen a beheading
Auschwitz liberation 70th anniversary: Woman sent to three Nazi death camps describes surviving gas chamber
Saudi preacher who 'raped and tortured' his five -year-old daughter to death is released after paying 'blood money'
Ukip Jelly Babies cause uproar on Amazon
Chilling drone footage captures Auschwitz ahead of 70th anniversary of liberation
'We would evict Queen from Buckingham Palace and allocate her council house,' say Greens
French court convicts three over homophobic tweets, in case hailed as a 'significant victory' by LGBT rights campaigners
Greece elections: Syriza and EU on collision course after election win for left-wing party
British Muslim school children suffering a backlash of abuse following Paris attacks
British grandmother Lindsay Sandiford faces execution by firing squad in Indonesia
Liberal Democrat minister defends comments suggesting immigration causes pub closures
Negotiable: Recruitment Genius: One of the world's leading suppliers and manuf...
£6240 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Apprentices are required to join a privat...
£40000 per annum: Sauce Recruitment: This is an exciting opportunity for a HR...
£35000 - £40000 per annum: Ashdown Group: A well-established organisation oper...