Diary: No 'Big Brother' for Bez

Celebrity maraca-player Bez, 46, will sadly be unavailable to take part in
Ultimate Big Brother. The former "freaky dancer" for the Happy Mondays – real name Mark Berry – was recently convicted of assault, and has now been jailed after informing a Manchester magistrate that he refused to recognise her authority. Marie Cash gave Bez a community sentence and ordered him to pay £450 in costs, but the performer – whose father was, would you believe, a rozzer – told her: "I'm not doing it. Bovvered. I'm going to appeal and take this to a real court." The kerfuffle concluded with Bez being led to the cells crying: "Victory is within my grasp!" and facing a four-week jail sentence. His assault on girlfriend Monica Ward took place in May: the court heard that Bez (not a chap you'd trust to recall where he'd left his keys) couldn't find the takings from a concert, flew into a rage and tried to throttle Ms Ward – also the lead singer in his band, Domino Bones. Their MySpace page suggests they're still booking gigs. Does one have Wi-Fi in jail?

* The New Statesman provided the first big media endorsement of Labour's leadership campaign yesterday, declaring its support for Ed Miliband, as if we should be surprised. NS editor Jason Cowley has interviewed Miliband (E) twice in as many months, and as long ago as January the mag ran a front-page headline which read: "Ed Miliband, Labour's Next Leader". Doing its very best to see the prophecy fulfilled, then.

* The early arrival of Florence Rose Endellion Cameron presents Nick Clegg with a chance to patch up those alleged poor relations with his party. Thanks to the PM's previously planned paternity leave, Clegg was due to fly to New York on 20 September as understudy at a UN summit, and to address the annual gathering of world leaders on the subject of international development. The only catch: it means he'll miss the second half of a potentially fractious Lib Dem Conference, which runs from 18 to 22 September. Now that Cameron's paternity leave has been brought forward, the PM could do the US trip after all, leaving Clegg to keep his party company in Liverpool.

No 10, however, tells me that so far Clegg has no plans to cancel his New York sojourn. Which must mean that either party relations are dandy, or that the divisions are just too deep for him to heal. Why else would anyone pass up the chance to mingle with Lib Dem members at Liverpool's BT convention centre, in favour of boring old Obama, Medvedev et al in Manhattan?

* Ed "Bruiser" Balls and Yvette Cooper, proud parents of three children and former first couple of the Cabinet, were understandably angry when they read the IFS report suggesting Coalition cuts are "clearly regressive". The pair quickly prepared their statements and rushed them off to the media: "So much for the Tory-Lib Dem Coalition's promise to be a family-friendly government," growled the Shadow Children's Secretary (that's Ed).

"These figures show the Government is pursuing a shocking and unfair attack on children and families," raged the Shadow Work and Pensions Secretary (that's Yvette). Helpfully, they packaged their opinions in a single mail-out: Awww... Is this the first ever "his'n'hers" political press release?

* Leading literary agent Andrew Wylie, known to all who fear him as "The Jackal", supposedly rocked the publishing world in July, when he announced he'd bypass any publishers refusing to pay a decent royalty rate for digital rights, by selling e-books from his formidable client list (Amis, Rushdie, Roth) directly to Amazon via his own company, Odyssey Editions. Wylie this week came to an agreement with Random House, however, and it appears the publishing world is to be rocked only very gently: Odyssey Editions will now release no more than seven e-book titles.

* Forget Franzen's new novel. The literary sensation of the season is surely David Musgrave's one-line poem from the latest issue of The New Yorker, entitled "On the Inevitable Decline into Mediocrity of the Popular Musician Who Attains a Comfortable Middle Age": "O Sting, Where is thy Death?"

highstreetken@independent.co.uk

Start your day with The Independent, sign up for daily news emails
  • Get to the point
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs People

Ashdown Group: HR Assistant (Events business) - Central Manchester - £20K

£18000 - £20000 per annum + Benefits: Ashdown Group: HR Assistant (Events busi...

Recruitment Genius: Project Engineer

Negotiable: Recruitment Genius: This privately-owned company designs and manuf...

Recruitment Genius: Human Resources Officer

£22000 - £25000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: An opportunity has arisen at th...

Ashdown Group: HR Manager - London - £40,000 + Bonus

£36000 - £40000 per annum + Bonus: Ashdown Group: HR Manager (Generalist) -Old...

Day In a Page

Where the spooks get their coffee fix: The busiest Starbucks in the US is also the most secretive

The secret CIA Starbucks

The coffee shop is deep inside the agency's forested Virginia compound
Revealed: How the Establishment closed ranks over fallout from Loch Ness Monster 'sighting'

How the Establishment closed ranks over fallout from Nessie 'sighting'

The Natural History Museum's chief scientist was dismissed for declaring he had found the monster
One million Britons using food banks, according to Trussell Trust

One million Britons using food banks

Huge surge in number of families dependent on emergency food aid
Excavation at Italian cafe to fix rising damp unearths 2,500 years of history in 3,000 amazing objects

2,500 years of history in 3,000 amazing objects

Excavation at Italian cafe to fix rising damp unearths trove
The Hubble Space Telescope's amazing journey, 25 years on

The Hubble Space Telescope's amazing journey 25 years on

The space telescope was seen as a costly flop on its first release
Did Conservative peer Lord Ashcroft quit the House of Lords to become a non-dom?

Did Lord Ashcroft quit the House of Lords to become a non-dom?

A document seen by The Independent shows that a week after he resigned from the Lords he sold 350,000 shares in an American company - netting him $11.2m
Apple's ethnic emojis are being used to make racist comments on social media

Ethnic emojis used in racist comments

They were intended to promote harmony, but have achieved the opposite
Sir Kenneth Branagh interview: 'My bones are in the theatre'

Sir Kenneth Branagh: 'My bones are in the theatre'

The actor-turned-director’s new company will stage five plays from October – including works by Shakespeare and John Osborne
The sloth is now the face (and furry body) of three big advertising campaigns

The sloth is the face of three ad campaigns

Priya Elan discovers why slow and sleepy wins the race for brands in need of a new image
How to run a restaurant: As two newbies discovered, there's more to it than good food

How to run a restaurant

As two newbies discovered, there's more to it than good food
Record Store Day: Remembering an era when buying and selling discs were labours of love

Record Store Day: The vinyl countdown

For Lois Pryce, working in a record shop was a dream job - until the bean counters ruined it
Usher, Mary J Blige and Will.i.am to give free concert as part of the Global Poverty Project

Mary J Blige and Will.i.am to give free concert

The concert in Washington is part of the Global Citizen project, which aims to encourage young people to donate to charity
10 best tote bags

Accessorise with a stylish shopper this spring: 10 best tote bags

We find carriers with room for all your essentials (and a bit more)
Paul Scholes column: I hear Manchester City are closing on Pep Guardiola for next summer – but I'd also love to see Jürgen Klopp managing in England

Paul Scholes column

I hear Manchester City are closing on Pep Guardiola for next summer – but I'd also love to see Jürgen Klopp managing in England
Jessica Ennis-Hill: 'I just want to give it my best shot'

Jessica Ennis-Hill: 'I just want to give it my best shot'

The heptathlete has gone from the toast of the nation to being a sleep-deprived mum - but she’s ready to compete again. She just doesn't know how well she'll do...