Miriam Gonzalez Durantez, international lawyer and Nick Clegg's wife: Choosing right partner 'crucial' in balancing career and family

The Dechert LLP partner and wife of Nick Clegg says she doesn't want to 'have it all' she just wants to 'have what men have'

Miriam Gonzalez – who does not call herself Clegg – is a highly successful lawyer (Reuters)

Miriam Gonzalez Durantez says that women must be given the option to do what their male peers are able to and that the only way to do that is to have a supportive partner.

Durantez is a partner at international law firm Dechert LLP and has three children with husband Nick Clegg.

"I am being asked all the time 'do you want to have it all', and, I don't want to have it all - I want to have what men have," she told the BBC.

"So if many men have children and a job, and that's what they choose, I do not know why I cannot have that, if that's what I choose.

"We should be free to choose whatever we want."

Talking at the launch of Inspiring Women in Scotland, she continued: "If you want to have children... If in a family you have children there is an issue if you want to work, as to how you are going to organise childcare.

"I think it was [Facebook COO] Sheryl Sandberg that said the most important decision in your life is who you have children with, so of course that is crucial."

Sandberg said in 2011 that she and her husband evenly split work in the home and their childcare, adding that choosing the right partner is very important in terms of being able to "have it all".

"I tell young women that the most career important decision you’ll make is who your life partner is," she said. "It’s more important than anything else you’ll decide because everything else is much more easily changeable."

"I have an awesome husband, we are at 50/50,” she continued. "It’s hard to get there. When we had our first child, he was working in a different city and we were flying back and forth, but as a family we prioritised both of his careers, not just his. As a family we prioritise our kids. At the beginning of the week and month, we sit down and look at our calendars and work out who is driving the kids to school and almost every single day it’s one of us."