Fighting for love online: Just follow our tips, Cheryl pet

She's an SWF with a GSOH who loves platitudes, hates footballers and promises to fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for your love. Yes, according to red-top reports, Cheryl Cole is venturing into the tricksy world of online dating.

"She wasn't sure at first, but now thinks, 'What have I got to lose?'," one of those ever-intimately acquainted "sources" has said. Oh, but Cheryl, you blithe thing, we do worry about you, and, before you commit to cyberspace, we urge you to take heed of the following, fail-safe tips:

1. Fake It

Forget what you may have told a hundred blubbing talent-show protégés about staying true to yourself. When first impressions are all, you can totally bag a classier type of guy by calling yourself a "singer-songwriter", pet.

2. Meet your date in a very public place

Some have suggested you've lost touch with your roots. So how better to re-establish yourself as the People's Pop Princess than a tête-à-tête with your civilian beau over a bit of Lady and the Tramp style spaghetti-sucking at Bella Pasta?

3. Keep it Light

The past couple of years might have been a right downer, but talk of sexting scoundrels and unwarranted sackings won't make for the happiest of dates. Play it safe with topics like kitsch children's TV shows. And Chocolate Philadelphia.

4. Keep your options open

You know all too well how fickle a man (cough, impresario father-figure) can be. So why not increase your chances with a different man every day? Well, except Saturdays, cos that's BGT night, natch.

Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs People

Recruitment Genius: Management Trainer

£30000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Exciting career opportunity to join East...

Recruitment Genius: Senior Scientist / Research Assistant

£18000 - £28000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: An ambitious start-up company b...

Reach Volunteering: Chair of Trustees

VOLUNTARY ONLY - EXPENSES REIMBURSED: Reach Volunteering: Do you love the Engl...

Day In a Page

How bad do you have to be to lose a Home Office contract?

How bad do you have to be to lose a Home Office contract?

Serco given Yarl’s Wood immigration contract despite ‘vast failings’
Green Party on the march in Bristol: From a lost deposit to victory

From a lost deposit to victory

Green Party on the march in Bristol
Putting the grot right into Santa's grotto

Winter blunderlands

Putting the grot into grotto
'It just came to us, why not do it naked?' London's first nude free runner captured in breathtaking images across capital

'It just came to us, why not do it naked?'

London's first nude free runner captured in breathtaking images across capital
In a world of Saudi bullying, right-wing Israeli ministers and the twilight of Obama, Iran is looking like a possible policeman of the Gulf

Iran is shifting from pariah to possible future policeman of the Gulf

Robert Fisk on our crisis with Iran
The young are the new poor: A third of young people pushed into poverty

The young are the new poor

Sharp increase in the number of under-25s living in poverty
Greens on the march: ‘We could be on the edge of something very big’

Greens on the march

‘We could be on the edge of something very big’
Revealed: the case against Bill Cosby - through the stories of his accusers

Revealed: the case against Bill Cosby

Through the stories of his accusers
Why are words like 'mongol' and 'mongoloid' still bandied about as insults?

The Meaning of Mongol

Why are the words 'mongol' and 'mongoloid' still bandied about as insults?
Mau Mau uprising: Kenyans still waiting for justice join class action over Britain's role in the emergency

Kenyans still waiting for justice over Mau Mau uprising

Thousands join class action over Britain's role in the emergency
Isis in Iraq: The trauma of the last six months has overwhelmed the remaining Christians in the country

The last Christians in Iraq

After 2,000 years, a community will try anything – including pretending to convert to Islam – to avoid losing everything, says Patrick Cockburn
Black Friday: Helpful discounts for Christmas shoppers, or cynical marketing by desperate retailers?

Helpful discounts for Christmas shoppers, or cynical marketing by desperate retailers?

Britain braced for Black Friday
Bill Cosby's persona goes from America's dad to date-rape drugs

From America's dad to date-rape drugs

Stories of Bill Cosby's alleged sexual assaults may have circulated widely in Hollywood, but they came as a shock to fans, says Rupert Cornwell
Clare Balding: 'Women's sport is kicking off at last'

Clare Balding: 'Women's sport is kicking off at last'

As fans flock to see England women's Wembley debut against Germany, the TV presenter on an exciting 'sea change'