Russell Brand has responded to an open letter from a disgruntled RBS worker, who complained an anti-capitalist protest staged by the comedian left him hungry.
Joseph Kynaston Reeves, 40, from Northern Ireland, wrote the strongly-worded letter to Brand after he attempted to enter the office where he worked.
While Brand thought he was sticking up for the less privileged by attempting to gain access to the RBS London office armed with a megaphone and a camera crew, Jo complained that he was unable to eat his rapidly cooling paella because security closed the building's lobby.
In a post on his Facebook page tonight, Brand apologised for holding up Jo and making his paella go cold, as well as speaking to him aggressively.
But he refused to say sorry for the lockdown.
“I can’t apologise for the RBS lockdown though mate because, I don’t have the authority to close great big institutions – even ones found guilty of criminal activity.
"I’d never knowingly keep a workingman from his dinner, it’s unacceptable and I do owe you an apology for being lairy," he went on.
Russell Brand's Most Controversial Quips
Russell Brand's Most Controversial Quips
1/19 On puberty:
“By puberty I learned that nothing worth having could be easily attained and to succeed one must be single minded."
2/19 On changing the world:
“I want to change the world, and do something valuable and beautiful. I want people to remember me before I'm dead, and then more afterwards.”
3/19 On being strong:
"Strength does not have to be belligerent and loud."
4/19 On grammar:
“I couldn't possibly have sex with someone with such a slender grasp on grammar!”
5/19 On manners in England:
"In England we have such good manners that if someone says something impolite, the police will get involved."
6/19 On junkie v vegetarian:
“Even as a junkie I stayed true [to vegetarianism] - 'I shall have heroin, but I shan't have a hamburger.' What a sexy little paradox.”
7/19 On the future:
“People don't realize that the future is just now, but later.”
8/19 On sex addiction:
“Boggle with sex addicts is up there with go-kart racing with junkies.”
9/19 On life:
“My life is just a series of embarrassing incidents strung together by telling people about those embarrassing incidents.”
Frazer Harrison/Getty Images
10/19 On happiness:
"If you want to be happy stop being so self-obsessed and start considering other people."
11/19 On drug addiction:
“The mentality and behavior of drug addicts and alcoholics is wholly irrational until you understand that they are completely powerless over their addiction and unless they have structured help, they have no hope.”
12/19 On sitcoms:
"I do have a regard for the musicality of language that came from BBC sitcoms like Fawlty Towers."
13/19 On life motivation:
"That's what keeps me alive, perversion and star quality.”
14/19 On love:
“When you fall in love you recognise you're not the most important person in the world, and your focus becomes another person.”
15/19 On threesomes:
“I like threesomes with two women, not because I'm a cynical sexual predator. Oh no! But because I'm a romantic. I'm looking for "The One." And I'll find her more quickly if I audition two at a time.”
16/19 On Conservatives:
"Conservatism appeals to our selfishness and fear, our designer and self-interest."
17/19 On surfing:
“Surfing should be called "foam-choking" or "sea stabbing.”
18/19 On Demi Moore:
"I've not made love to her yet, but it's a matter of time."
STEVE MORGAN/AFP/Getty Images
19/19 On success:
"When I was growing up, I thought I'd be a lot happier if I was famous and successful and if I had money."
The comedian and activist explained that he had attempted to enter the RBS building because he and filmmaker Michael Winterbottom are making a documentary about the economic crash.
Brand also hit back at claims that the lock-down was a publicity stunt but said Jo “could be forgiven for thinking so”.
“If I needed negative publicity (and, believe me, that’s all talking publicly about inequality can ever get you) I could get it by using the “N word” on telly, or putting a cat in a bin, or having a romantic liaison with the lad from TOWIE,” he joked.
In the lengthy 1,019-word post, Brand explained his stance on the banks, public money, and bonuses in his characteristically verbose style.
"Put simply Jo, the banks took the money, the people paid the price," he wrote.
He concludes by urging Jo to get in touch, and asking him to join him for a hot paella “to make up for the one that went cold”.
“When I make a mistake I like to apolgise [sic] and put it right. Hopefully your bosses will do the same to the people of Britain,” he added.