Pandora: In the blue corner...

It's gloves off (or should that be on?) in the fight for Mid-Bedfordshire. The seat is currently held by Tory pin-up Nadine Dorries, who won with a sizable majority in 2005, but made few hearts bleed with her implorations that the pressure of the expenses scandal had left Commons-dwellers "suicidal".

Her Lib Dem opponent, Linda Jack, hopes to ride to victory capturing Labour's vote (her recent leaflets claim the area is unwinnable for them) and has deployed US-style viral ads calling into question Dorries' suitability. Her most recent tactic, however, appears rather less effective: delivering hand-written letters to constituents choc-a-bloc with pledges of the good she would do if elected. Unfortunately, no one knows they are from her.

"They all think it's me!" explains Dorries. "It's on blue paper and who's going to ready all the way to the end? It's a political letter. Anyway, the signature's unintelligible."

Understandably, Dorries isn't too unhappy at the thought of the free good press. "It's fine. It's not attacking, it's... stupid." Jack, alas, was unavailable to defend herself.

Missing out on Miriam

Along with every news outlet, Vogue has turned its attention to the ongoing election campaign. First up for scrutiny on the fashion bible's website are the party leaders' cufflinks (or, in Brown's case, lack thereof; but what does it mean?). Next up is a look at the wives' sartorial selections. Well, SamCam versus Sarah, that is. But what of Miriam González Durántez, above, Nick Clegg's elegant wife? Not a mention. Too bad!

* With every day of the campaign, the jokes grow feebler. At least, that can be the only explanation for this poor show on David Milliband's behalf. A mischievous bumble bee, we're told, persisted in dive-bombing the Foreign Secretary at a Labour rally in Wood Green. "It's got yellow bits, so it must be a Lib-Dem bee," joked David.

Ah yes, blame Nick.

* Brian May's opposition to fox-hunting saw him square up to the Conservatives earlier this week. Next stop: Victoria Beckham. The bushy rocker posted a recent picture of Posh Spice striding through Heathrow sporting an of-the-moment Louis Vuitton fox fun keychain, with the caption, "I might just throw up." Not planning a collaboration, then?

Madeleymakes his mark

Richard Madeley made his first appearance of the election (long overdue!) with a slot on yesterday's World At One. Those papers that had turned their fire on Nick Clegg were wrong, he raged, and had underestimated their readers. Let's hope he decides to set them right in his column in tomorrow's Express. Yesterday they ran with "Clegg's Crazy Immigration Policy." Wouldn't want to bite the hand that feeds.

pandora@independent.co.uk

PROMOTED VIDEO
News
ebooksAn unforgettable anthology of contemporary reportage
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs People

HR Advisor - North London / North West London

£30000 - £35000 per annum + Benefits: Ashdown Group: HR Advisor - North London...

Finance Manager - Recruitment Business (Media & Entertainment)

£28000 - £32000 per annum + negotiable: Sauce Recruitment: We have an exciting...

HR Advisor - North London / North West London

£30000 - £35000 per annum + Benefits: Ashdown Group: HR Advisor - North London...

HR Advisor - North London / North West London

£30000 - £35000 per annum + Benefits: Ashdown Group: HR Advisor - North London...

Day In a Page

Two super-sized ships have cruised into British waters, but how big can these behemoths get?

Super-sized ships: How big can they get?

Two of the largest vessels in the world cruised into UK waters last week
British doctors on brink of 'cure' for paralysis with spinal cord treatment

British doctors on brink of cure for paralysis

Sufferers can now be offered the possibility of cure thanks to a revolutionary implant of regenerative cells
Let's talk about loss

We need to talk about loss

Secrecy and silence surround stillbirth
Will there be an all-female mission to Mars?

Will there be an all-female mission to Mars?

Women may be better suited to space travel than men are
Oscar Pistorius sentencing: The athlete's wealth and notoriety have provoked a long overdue debate on South African prisons

'They poured water on, then electrified me...'

If Oscar Pistorius is sent to jail, his experience will not be that of other inmates
James Wharton: The former Guard now fighting discrimination against gay soldiers

The former Guard now fighting discrimination against gay soldiers

Life after the Army has brought new battles for the LGBT activist James Wharton
Ebola in the US: Panic over the virus threatens to infect President Obama's midterms

Panic over Ebola threatens to infect the midterms

Just one person has died, yet November's elections may be affected by what Republicans call 'Obama's Katrina', says Rupert Cornwell
Premier League coaches join the RSC to swap the tricks of their trades

Darling, you were fabulous! But offside...

Premier League coaches are joining the RSC to learn acting skills, and in turn they will teach its actors to play football. Nick Clark finds out why
How to dress with authority: Kirsty Wark and Camila Batmanghelidjh discuss the changing role of fashion in women's workwear

How to dress with authority

Kirsty Wark and Camila Batmanghelidjh discuss the changing role of fashion in women's workwear
New book on Joy Division's Ian Curtis sheds new light on the life of the late singer

New book on Ian Curtis sheds fresh light on the life of the late singer

'Joy Division were making art... Ian was for real' says author Jon Savage
Sean Harris: A rare interview with British acting's secret weapon

Sean Harris: A rare interview with British acting's secret weapon

The Bafta-winner talks Hollywood, being branded a psycho, and how Barbra Streisand is his true inspiration
Tim Minchin, interview: The musician, comedian and world's favourite ginger is on scorching form

Tim Minchin interview

For a no-holds-barred comedian who is scathing about woolly thinking and oppressive religiosity, he is surprisingly gentle in person
Boris Johnson's boozing won't win the puritan vote

Boris's boozing won't win the puritan vote

Many of us Brits still disapprove of conspicuous consumption – it's the way we were raised, says DJ Taylor
Ash frontman Tim Wheeler reveals how he came to terms with his father's dementia

Tim Wheeler: Alzheimer's, memories and my dad

Wheeler's dad suffered from Alzheimer's for three years. When he died, there was only one way the Ash frontman knew how to respond: with a heartfelt solo album