Pandora: Will battle-hardened Prezza become a Lord?
Thursday 08 April 2010
Once his (almost) legendary battle bus is relegated to the great, post-election garage in the sky, how long can it be until John Prescott is awarded a peerage?
Gordon Brown has yet to announce a Dissolution Honours List – though Prezza, having been deputy leader and deputy prime minister, would be more than qualified for a spot.
Asked about the prospect during a late-night appearance on the BBC, Prescott appeared equivocal, chuckling when the possibility that his wife might not be disinclined to enjoy the title "Lady Prescott".
Of course, the title may well be fleeting; Gordon Brown has made his intention to make the Lords fully elected clear, which raises the prospect of the Prescott campaign bus being brought back into action once more, this time being driven straight to the House of Lords.
Curiously, no one from Prezza's camp was keen to comment on the possibility last night. "We're just concentrating on getting the bus around this time," insisted the Labour veteran's son, David.
Elocution, elocution, elocution
Repeat after us: the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain. Despite having a string of period pieces to her name, the actress Gemma Arterton's Gravesend vowels still proved too much for director Stephen Frears, who cast Arterton in his forthcoming adaptation of the Posy Simmonds comic strip. "I went into this 'meeting and he went: 'Oh dear, oh dear. Why do you speak like that?'" says Arterton. "That's where I'm from! He said: 'Well you're going to have to sort that out.'" What a charmer.
Brown ready to swap bananas for kiwi
Time for the nation's nutritionists to breathe a sigh of relief. Reports that Gordon Brown was consuming "up to nine" bananas a day were met with dismay by dieticians, who cited the fruit's "bloating" properties. During yesterday's trip to the Innocent Smoothie factory, however, a quip from LBC 97.3 that Brown might want to "swap his bananas" for one of the drinks was – we're told – met with prime ministerial praise for the kiwi and mango options on offer. No 10 catering department, take note.
In Dave's pocket?
Given David Cameron's fondness for Boden shorts, surely it won't be long before Middle England's mail order catalogue of choice announces its electoral endorsement. "Johnnie Boden did once send me some vouchers," confesses the Tory leader to Red magazine. "I sent them straight back! I paid for my own shorts." Perks, eh?
*Plaudits to shadow Defence Secretary Liam Fox, who displayed impressive hand-to-eye co-ordination while waiting for an interview with Kay Burley yesterday. A sudden gust of wind threatened to blow away the Sky News gazebo, only for Dr Fox to leap into action to save it. "Everyone else rather panicked," we're told.
- 1 Nigel Farage: Me vs Russell Brand on Question Time – he's got the chest hair but where are his ideas?
- 2 Harry Potter fans can apply to the Hogwarts-inspired College of Wizardry
- 3 Jessica Chambers: 19-year-old woman 'doused with lighter fluid and burned alive' in the US
- 4 Russell Brand calls Nigel Farage 'poundshop Enoch Powell' in BBC Question Time debate
- 5 Orange Wednesdays are no more
Weather bomb in pictures: Storms cuts power for tens of thousands – and snow is on the way
Jessica Chambers: 19-year-old woman 'doused with lighter fluid and burned alive' in the US
Russell Brand calls Nigel Farage 'poundshop Enoch Powell' in BBC Question Time debate
Russell Brand was rendered speechless on Question Time by this man
Fury at Airbus after it hints the super-jumbo may be mothballed
Disgruntled RBS worker writes hilarious open letter to Russell Brand after anti-capitalist publicity stunt leaves him hungry
Shock poll shows voters believe Ukip is to the left of the Tories
Nigel Farage's approval rating hits 'record low' as popularity suffers in wake of Ukip sex scandal
Nigel Farage defends Kerry Smith 'ch***y' comment: 'If you are going for a Chinese, what do you say you’re going for?'
Ukip candidate jokes about 'shooting peasants' in racist and homophobic rant
Pakistan school attack live: Taliban kill at least 132 children in 'horrifying' massacre
£25000 - £30000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: They are in need of a HR Manage...
£35000 - £40000 per annum + £65,000 OTE: h2 Recruit Ltd: London, Birmingham, M...