The 5-Minute Interview: Mark McGowan, Artist

Mark McGowan, 37, ate a swan in an 'art performance' protest against the Queen. In 2005 he angered activists and Thames Water with 'The Running Tap', where he left the water running in a London gallery to highlight leakage. Next week he will protest against fox-hunting.

If I weren't talking to you right now I'd be ...

Getting ready for the degree show at Camberwell College of Art. I am the press Svengali. We are showing the world's largest hair sculpture. It's massive and it's full of hair.

A phrase I use too often ...

"In an extraordinary art event, artist Mark McGowan is going to ..."

I wish people would take more notice of ...

Me and listen to what I've got to say because it's important. There's a few people we could sort out like Prince Philip or just get rid of the royals but I don't want to go on any protest. I don't care about most of it. It's a bit of an act. I like the effects of some of what I do. The Running Tap was a great social and political protest about water waste. But the thing I like the most is the performance aspect. I liked the fact that it was being wasted. I think we live in a brilliant world. The past 100 years have been just fantastic. Think about how it used to be.

The most surprising thing that happened to me was ...

That someone could ever love me. I crawled 55 miles from London to Canterbury on my hands and knees looking for love. Maybe it's to do with self-esteem. I can't believe that someone could love me and I feel like I should be grateful. It happened seven years ago. I don't want to say anything else about it.

A common misperception of me is ...

That I'm an idiot. Within the art world they definitely think I'm an idiot. I'm not sure if it's a misconception. I am interested in the idea of shame. A teacher told me at school, "you're an idiot. You're stupid". I wasn't very good at exams. Part of my art is to be portrayed as an idiot and to be seen as a fool. One of the things about shame is that when you do it in public it has a certain amount of power attached to it and you can use that power.

I am not a politician but ...

If I could I would stop all the wars, take the British and Americans out of Afghanistan and Iraq, dismantle every bullet and every bomb. There'd be no more metal things like knives. We could eat with our hands.

I'm good at ...

Crawling on my hands and knees. I can do up to five miles a day. Crawling to me is like jogging.

I'm very bad at ...

Listening. I'm bad at paying attention. I can't read books because after two lines my mind wanders.

The ideal night out is ...

Going to the pictures and having a meal with my girlfriend.

In moments of weakness I ...

Cry or run away ... or crawl away. That's actually happened. To get over it I'll do a project.

You know me as an artist but I may have been a...

Drug addict. Heroin, crack cocaine all of them. When I was little I wanted to be a carpenter like my dad.

The best age to be is...

37. I'm always 37. I've been 37 quite a few years.

In a nutshell, my philosophy is this:

Take part in the spectacle and always enter it in the shallow end.