Tulisa Contostavlos attempted suicide with pills and alcohol after Fake Sheikh drugs sting left her deeply depressed

Mazher Mahmood, also known as 'the Fake Sheikh', is now being investigated by the Crown Prosecution Service

Tulisa Contostavlos, the former X Factor judge, has revealed that she tried to commit suicide last year after she was charged with supplying Class A drugs.

In a BBC documentary being broadcast tonight, the singer tells for the first time how she took a potentially lethal combination of pills and alcohol following a sting by The Sun on Sunday’s Mazher Mahmood.

Seen in the film sobbing hysterically as she describes the “evil” reporters behind the newspaper’s operation, she says: “They’ve f**ked me up good and proper. They’re killing me, they’re killing me, they’re fucking killing me.

“I just want my life back,” she says. “They’ve ruined me. This would never have happened unless they created the situation. They made it happen.”

The case against the former N-Dubz singer was based on a sting by The Sun on Sunday, in which journalists posing as film producers approached Contostavlos and flew her to Los Angeles and Las Vegas on the promise of a role in a film with Leonardo DiCaprio.

The paper published its findings in a front-page exclusive under the headline “Tulisa’s Cocaine Deal Shame” on 2 June 2013, but the trial was thrown out of court last week after the undercover reporter who persuaded her to boast that she could supply him with cocaine was found to have lied in court.

Mahmood, also known as “the Fake Sheikh”, is now being investigated by the Crown Prosecution Service, which is scrutinising the accuracy of evidence given by him in more than 30 previous criminal cases.

Mazher Mahmood's article was given the splash treatment by The Sun on Sunday Mazher Mahmood's article was given the splash treatment by The Sun on Sunday

The BBC Three documentary Tulisa: The Price of Fame follows the singer from the moment news of the drug deal broke through what became a year-long ordeal, and includes webcam footage filmed by Contostavlos.

Speaking after her attempted suicide in December 2013, she described how she was an “emotional wreck” when she learned she would be formally charged with the offence, saying she spent hours screaming and crying with her cousin and fellow N-Dubz member Dappy, before “necking” a cocktail of pills and alcohol.

“I’d had a drink so everything felt even more intensified,” she said. “ I don’t even know what I was planning to do.”

Video: The Tulisa drugs trial

A friend called an ambulance but Contostavlos refused to go to hospital. “Luckily I was just drowsy,” she said. “I woke up the next day just numb.”

Describing the feelings that led her to that point, the singer said: “I don’t have the energy any more to do this and even if I get through it, then what? I’m just going to be drained as a person.

“I’m going to be numb by the end of this. I don’t know how much of me I’m going to have left. And I was like, shall I just end it? Shall I just get on with it and just never have to feel like this ever again?”

Contostavlos has spoken openly in the past about her teenage suicide attempts. The singer, who grew up on a Camden council estate, overdosed on pills aged 14 and cut her wrists when she was 17.

As media interest in the case grew, Contostavlos left her £4.5m mansion in Hertfordshire and moved into in a small flat in north London, after she began to feel unsafe in her own home.

“I am going to sell that house,” she says in the documentary. “After everything that’s happened, I don’t feel safe there at all. I don’t even want to drive back there to pick up my stuff because I’m afraid that someone will follow me.”

Start your day with The Independent, sign up for daily news emails
PROMOTED VIDEO
ebooks
ebooksA year of political gossip, levity and intrigue from the sharpest pen in Westminster
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs People

Recruitment Genius: HR Manager

£25000 - £30000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: They are in need of a HR Manage...

h2 Recruit Ltd: Business Development Manager - HR Consultancy - £65,000 OTE

£35000 - £40000 per annum + £65,000 OTE: h2 Recruit Ltd: London, Birmingham, M...

Day In a Page

Surrounded by high-rise flats is a little house filled with Lebanon’s history - clocks, rifles, frogmen’s uniforms and colonial helmets

Clocks, rifles, swords, frogmen’s uniforms

Surrounded by high-rise flats is a little house filled with Lebanon’s history
Return to Gaza: Four months on, the wounds left by Israel's bombardment have not yet healed

Four months after the bombardment, Gaza’s wounds are yet to heal

Kim Sengupta is reunited with a man whose plight mirrors the suffering of the Palestinian people
Gastric surgery: Is it really the answer to the UK's obesity epidemic?

Is gastric surgery really the answer to the UK's obesity epidemic?

Critics argue that it’s crazy to operate on healthy people just to stop them eating
Homeless Veterans appeal: Christmas charity auction Part 2 - now LIVE

Homeless Veterans appeal: Christmas charity auction

Bid on original art, or trips of a lifetime to Africa or the 'Corrie' set, and help Homeless Veterans
Pantomime rings the changes to welcome autistic theatre-goers

Autism-friendly theatre

Pantomime leads the pack in quest to welcome all
The week Hollywood got scared and had to grow up a bit

The week Hollywood got scared and had to grow up a bit

Sony suffered a chorus of disapproval after it withdrew 'The Interview', but it's not too late for it to take a stand, says Joan Smith
From Widow Twankey to Mother Goose, how do the men who play panto dames get themselves ready for the performance of a lifetime?

Panto dames: before and after

From Widow Twankey to Mother Goose, how do the men who play panto dames get themselves ready for the performance of a lifetime?
Thirties murder mystery novel is surprise runaway Christmas hit

Thirties murder mystery novel is surprise runaway Christmas hit

Booksellers say readers are turning away from dark modern thrillers and back to the golden age of crime writing
Anne-Marie Huby: 'Charities deserve the best,' says founder of JustGiving

Anne-Marie Huby: 'Charities deserve the best'

Ten million of us have used the JustGiving website to donate to good causes. Its co-founder says that being dynamic is as important as being kind
The botanist who hunts for giant trees at Kew Gardens

The man who hunts giants

A Kew Gardens botanist has found 25 new large tree species - and he's sure there are more out there
The 12 ways of Christmas: Spare a thought for those who will be working to keep others safe during the festive season

The 12 ways of Christmas

We speak to a dozen people who will be working to keep others safe, happy and healthy over the holidays
Birdwatching men have a lot in common with their feathered friends, new study shows

The male exhibits strange behaviour

A new study shows that birdwatching men have a lot in common with their feathered friends...
Diaries of Evelyn Waugh, Virginia Woolf and Noël Coward reveal how they coped with the December blues

Famous diaries: Christmas week in history

Noël Coward parties into the night, Alan Clark bemoans the cost of servants, Evelyn Waugh ponders his drinking…
From noble to narky, the fall of the open letter

From noble to narky, the fall of the open letter

The great tradition of St Paul and Zola reached its nadir with a hungry worker's rant to Russell Brand, says DJ Taylor
A Christmas ghost story by Alison Moore: A prodigal daughter has a breakthrough

A Christmas ghost story by Alison Moore

The story was published earlier this month in 'Poor Souls' Light: Seven Curious Tales'