Politics: A bumpy ride down the single-track road of Scotland

The Sketch

YESTERDAY WAS the day I had been dreading. Forty minutes of sheer boredom at Scottish questions were relieved by few moments of parliamentary excitement.

After the heady atmosphere during the age of consent debate the previous evening the House of Commons got back to normal with Scottish members peddling their local hobbyhorses with eyes only on their local newspaper headlines.

David Stewart (Lab, Inverness East, Nairn and Lochaber) was concerned about road deaths in his constituency and stimulated other members with Highland constituencies, such as Robert Maclennan (Lib Dem, Caithness, Sutherland and Easter Ross), to formulate about the need for a policy to deal with single-track roads. Quite what the Government, regardless of complexion, could do about this "problem" escapes me.

We moved onto livelier ground when Eleanor Laing (Con, Epping Forest), fresh from her brave stand in the age of consent debate, homed in on the scandal of direct labour department incompetence in Scottish local government. Mrs Laing is fast becoming one of the Tory women rising stars and packs a powerful scratch.

Tories, frightened of raising sleaze for obvious reasons, are beginning to draw blood by raising the embarrassments of Labour's record in Scottish local government and Mrs Laing was ably followed up by the other star new girl, journalist turned politician Julie Kirkbride (Con, Bromsgrove), who tackled Donald Dewar, Secretary of State, on abuses by the Labour- controlled East Ayrshire Council.

Mr Dewar would normally have passed the buck on this to his junior minister Calum Macdonald but Mr Dewar told the House that "my Hon Friend the member for Western Isles has been sent to France for the Moroccan game".

Mr Dewar then played for time by doing the usual ritual of wishing the Scottish lads well, saying how sorry he was that England lost and burbled as an afterthought, to laughter, "so far as East Ayrshire is concerned", a few words about enquiries, reviews and the need to await the outcome of something called the "Mackintosh Report".

I am sure Mr Dewar genuinely does want to clean up the Scottish Labour Party and there are clear signs that he is using his substantial influence to this effect but, for the time being, Tories are scoring some runs on this issue, even if, ironically, the Scottish Nationalists are the electoral beneficiary.

The new Tory spokesman, Liam Fox, wade in, to good effect, on his first outing. He is a bright boy, who has had a meteoric rise in the party, having been elected only in 1992. One of Mr Hague's acolytes, he gave Mr Dewar an awkward time by demanding that no tax- payer in the sleaze councils would have to pay for the incompetence and inefficiencies of Labour town hall bosses. Mr Dewar admitted he could give no such assurances.

Dr Norman Godman (Lab, Grenock and Inverclyde) suggested that reform of the local electoral system was the answer and, in passing, referred to his wife's recent selection as a candidate for the proposed Scottish Assembly. We learned that Mr Dewar is "looking forward to having dinner with you and your wife on Saturday".

Jonathan Sayeed (Con, Mid Bedfordshire) hammered home the Tory attack by reminding Mr Dewar of Monklands Council, which has a history of nepotism and abuse of public trust. "Weren't these problems known when Neil Kinnock and John Smith were Labour leaders?" he bellowed.

Mr Dewar, consummate Commons performer, when in the corner simply hurled friendly abuse and ignored the question. "The Hon Gentleman is an early Monty Python without the humour."

Sadly, from my point of view, I would have given anything for Monty Python to have enlivened yesterday's proceedings, with or without the humour.

Roll on devolution!